TRASH
Duane Peters reacts to the
news that the Warp Tour
now includes, Yak sex and
a gay love tent.
GERM FREE
The Eurocentric publication Limited
ran a scathing critique of Greg
Carroll's microphone abilities.
Apparently, the continental types took
exception to Greg's pro USA stance.
his tattoos, and his physically combat-
ive nature. Carroll responded by pur-
chasing several grand worth of new old
stock chrome trim and interior details
for his 1954 Chevrolet. Apparently,
Greg's appreciation for his old bomb
increased when his brand new truck
took a shit on him after only three
days of service.
In a related development. Airwalk offi-
cials have been heard stating that their
company will not sponsor the World Cup at
Münster next year. This is the latest major hit
to Titus and company's Deutchland uber
alles' promotional machine.
After the Olympic telecast, which imparted the
wisdom that the gross dollar total for the skate
industry was "500 million dollars per
year," there has been a deluge of greedy
types looking to cash in on this "bonanza."
A pair of avaricious interlopers are making
the rounds, attempting to hook up that ever
elusive snow/surf/skate shoe program.
Armed with a recent skate biz report that
stated that companies like Simple and
Airwalk had gone from 12 to 60 and
from 176 to 224 million per year, respec-
tively, these embryonic moguls are
talking big. Their most recent business
plan featured a proposed multi-sport
shoe for "ripping the street, slopes
and waves." At a Duke's restaurant
opening in Malibu, the aspiring
tycoons approached eatery co-
owner Rusty Keaulana and
floated their ultimate jock
shoe concept. Russ K sized up
their program in a millisecond
and responded, "Brah, there's
only one problem, surfer's
ride barefoot."
SWAN SONG
Jason Lee is
reportedly becoming
more active
again in running the Stereo.
empire. However, his
involvement currently
hinges on the popularity of
a soon to be released TV
series that he is fronting.
Worse yet was the six-page
ad in Vogue magazine and a
coast to coast billboard cam-
paign for "Think." Of course.
these blatant forgeries have no
connection whatsoever to
the skate line of the
same name.
David
Hackett
has taken
to handing
out cigars
while he
enter-
tains.
possi-
bili-
ties of
SPIT
Andy Roy hates spiders.
releasing a signature model. Is his talking to
skate companies inspired by the recent suc-
cess of Jay Adams. Duane Peters and Lord
Salba? Has the lucrative prize money on the
ESPN circuit lured DH back into the fray, or is
Hackett talking about a signature-emblazoned,
all-terrain humidor? Wasn't David seen in
Chicago at the Tobacco Convention in the com-
pany of an expatriate Centro-American general
who has become a cigar exporter?
The pristine mountain wilderness of Yosemite
plays host to a rabid skate scene. The latest
SKATE SAFE
Joey Tershay gives new meaning to the term
pool shark at the very full Basic Pool.
noteworthy transplants are Salman and
Laura Agah. In concert with a church
youth group. Salman is building a 40 ft
wide ramp on an 8 acre site.
Gershon Mosley is said to be receiv-
ing $7.000 per month from his new
sponsor, Tree Fort. That company's
recent outpouring of cash incited a
rumor that Tree Fort was now actually
backed by Mattel. The toy giant who
used to manufacture Magnum skate-
boards, Hot Wheels, and Malibu
Barbie has been actively fol-
lowing the skate marketi
lately. Reportedly.
Mattel has unsuccess
fully attempted to buy
a couple of other
skate companies in the
immediate past. A
recent corporation M
purchase is purport-
edly Morey Boogie.
Inventor Tom
Morey is said to be
developing new
FIRE
A products in his
Dana Point work-
shop on an end-
less subsidy from Mattel. Was Mosley's
departure from the Powell Brigade somehow
related to a rather noisy argument which was
said to be overheard by many in the Blood
rollerblade wheels booth at a recent trade
show? Did Gershon finally vent his frustration
in a confrontation with Steve Caballero?
Has Steve been waiting for months for a return
phone call from his old Bones mate, Stacy
Peralta? And, finally, has a certain snow/skate
maker who often brags about his secret intelli-
gence source deep in the bowels of Powell
been telling people that Peralta was/is still
involved with the company?
for each instance of illegal sticker placement.
Paradoxically. Black Fly executive Jonathan
Paskowitz allegedly decided to test the consti-
tutionality of the ban and took it upon himself to
suitably emblazon the surroundings with pres-
sure sensitive peelable art. Now rumor has it
that the company has been fined $12,000 for
supposed transgressions.
NO NAMES
Kevin "Tumbleweed" Ancell has turned up
in the motion picture industry, working with the
likes of Robin Williams. Was this instanta-
neous career change the result of Tumbleweed's
just completed art show pacan to the Swastika
Mike Vallely is still injured, but said to be surfboard? Furthermore, did Ancell sell a hand-
rapidly recovering back cast.
TOP SHELF
Since Birdhouse ace Per Welinder was over-
heard claiming that they were shipping twenty
thousand boards a month, and with the total
market being sized at approximately one hun-
dred thousand units a month, does that then
mean that Birdhouse is now the best selling
board maker? Rumors persist that corporate
founder Tony Hawk sold a
business computer program
he developed for 3.3 mil-
lion dollars to an interna-
tional software developer.
Eric Swenson's Potrero
Hill driveway has been
renowned for years
because of its sublime
banks and grindable curb
face-suffice to say that
Swenson is used to lots of
drama going down around
the pad. The venerable.
foundry man who has
undoubtedly produced
more trucks than anyone
laminated custom 7 ft long hill running skate to
Japan's premiere surf/skate collector for $2,500?
Did June Bug Ikeda broker the deal?
Which Mag corporate higher up threw a tem-
per tantrum over former contributor Jimmy
Fitzpatrick's accidental breaking of his surf-
board? Did ex- publishing magnate Tracker
Larry Balma actually have to step in and throw
down some cash to keep the peace?
Which mega industrial
skate truck titan walked into
a BMW dealership and paid
cash for a V-8 powered ride?
Is the circumspect power
broker being sly about his
latest purchase and keeping
it under wraps? The aston-
ished salesman had to
import this rare high perfor-
mance vehicle from the East
Coast. Did he also ask the
manu why he was willing to
spend an additional $10,000
to get the V-8 power plant
option? The answer was a
gem of shuttle diplomacy: "I
else in history was recently BALD SPOT OF THE YEARke to go fast. Can a
astounded to arrive home
from his Hunter's Point atelier to discover his
home wrapped in vinyl crime scene tape and
surrounded by cops. Swenson knew he had
problems when some sharp-dressed undercover
type drew down and told him to freeze. Being no
fool, Eric did what any other good citizen would
do in the same circumstance: he promptly accel-
erated. Things went from bad to worse as a tor-
rent of automatic weapons fire erupted towards
Swenson's speeding car. As he pulled out of the
killing zone, our hero nearly clipped another
gun-wielding type, who drove onto the sidewalk
to avoid being crushed by the skidding vehicle.
Imagine Mr E's surprise when he discovered that
the guy he nearly killed was none other than
Don Johnson, the actor. Even odder yet is the
fact that Steve Berra plays Johnson's
son in the series. The television.
executives who had decided
to film in Swenson's front
yard had neglected to
inform him of their activities.
Reportedly, the TV guys' fat
cash contribution to Eric
helped fund a new motor for
his 8-second dragster.
STUCK UP
Security at the recent Magic apparel super-
show in Las Vegas was so tight that some evil
genius decided that a $200 fine should be levied
grudge match with the BMW
driving czar of a rival truck concern be far off.
or will he be content to attend motorsport rallies
with Alfonzo Rawls in his BMW M3?
Will snowboard companies all start manu-
facturing skateboards in an effort to get year-
round cash flow?
Freedumb's designs are already being knocked
off by the corpses of haute couture. New York
boutiques are selling imitation beaver shirts.
which are a pale imitation of the Dan Drehobl
original. Is Dan receiving those acupuncture
treatments from a 93-year-old Chinese
master for stress related to the
aforementioned.
or is it for his pulled
groin muscle?
Will Schmitt actually turn into a
manufacturer of boards for other
companies and abandon his own
label's marketing activities? Why do
some feel that Lumpy is dismantling
his amateur program? Is Acme maestro
Jim Gray rumored to be close to turn-
ing his efforts into OEM (Original
Equipment Manufacturing) as well?
POSER OF THE MONTH
VICTIM: Jason Bowey
CRIME: Superglue 50/50
SENTENCE: Steel Pole Enema
LONG GONE
change the bands on the cigars just to get
through customs, but they're real Cubans, just
like Castro." -Dave Hackett
"I go to the IASC meetings to find out what's
happening"-FiberFats MacIntyre
"You're nothing but a team van driver."
-Gershon Mosley
"They asked me how much I'd sell out for, and
I told them, 'nothing, so they gave me three
times that."-Kevin Ancell
"My only interest now is television shows and
commercials."-Mike Santarossa
You lookin'
at me?
130 THRASHER