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ISLAND FEVER
I'm a rollerbloder, and I hate your guts. You guys
never give us respect. I give you lots of respect,
because I used to skateboard, and I know it's hard
Why do you people hate us so much? You guys
probably can't even stand up on rollerblades. If any
of you skateboarders are reading this, maybe you'
give us respect now. Some skateboarders say we
Site your style, but we don't. Everyone wears boggy
jeans now, so we don't bite you!"
Bite the D. Asshole! Ted
BRAIN TRUST
Travis McCann
Honolulu, H
Everyone has thoughts, feelings, ideas, etc. Life
bas given us the privilege of reason and judgement
Based on my lifestyle, here is a lid to live by
1. Skate for fun, skate to be cool, skate for yourself,
skate because your sponsor says someone is film
ing Who gives a shit, just skate
2. Blunts and brew make for an obnoxious crew.
3. Free your mind and body, so we can all enjoy
each other's natural pleasure sex.
4. G's up, hoe's down.
5.
Kurt Cobain sucks fat gus loods. If you are to
worship any dead entertainers, make it Eazy-E
6. Tom Knox is a prime example of a shitty skater
who complains that trends and fashion are the ree
sons he gets no coverage. Face it, Tom, you suck!
7. Pass dat blunt, fool!
8. Big ollies get the girlies' stinkboxes wet.
9. East Coast, West Coast, it's all the same game.
10. Live fast, die young skate or die, sex, drugs and
rock n' roll; hit the rood; live to your fullest
DEAR TOM KNOX
Funk Diggy
Pak Town, NY
As evidenced by your letter, you seem to be
having problems occepting your has been status
Get over it. Realize your dream is dead. And,
another thing, please don't compare yourself to
Mark Gonzales. Did you hoppen to see his ed on
the next page?
Shown Fontes
Oakland, CA
ANTI-CHRIST
I'm writing in response to the letter written by Matt
Nicoletti titled "Clothes Line" that appeared in the
May '96 issue. Well, Matt, all I'd like to say is that if
I had a cock, you could suck mine, and Satan's, too
(notice I spelled Satan right!). You're a little fucking
shithead, and I'd like to kick your little, red zit-cov
ered ass. Just because you're mad about your herpes
acting up doesn't mean that you should shove your
uneducated, not to mention idiotic, opinions down
our throats. Maybe it's just me, but I personally don't
like to be spoon-fed bullshit by closed-minded pigs
like you. You think Satan sucks? Great! I care! But
just because you're religious and believe a certain
way, does that mean that we have to, aha? I'd ahe
like to point out that for someone as "religious" as
yourself, you really don't express in your vocab
ulary. I've never heard of any religious person who
uses the words "pussies" or "fuck. Is it my imagi
nation or could that be considered sacrilegious?
Especially since you were lecturing us
about God all the time. Isn't that almost
as bad as the very thing you're com
plaining about?
Maybe the reason people in your school
wolk around yelling, "Satan rules!" is
because they don't really care what you
think. Have you ever considered that? Or
maybe they're just trying to eggravate
you because you're an annoying limle prick, and they
know it annoys the piss out of you.
Where exactly do you get off calling people
pesers? You're a hypocritical bastard. The day that
everyone accepts each other and learns to be them
selves is the day that posers will actually feel com
fortable being themselves. Of course, we all know
this isn't going to happen. After all, people are pos
ing for a reason, and that usually being a total lack
of personality. But there is a way to solve half of the
problem: kill off all the hypocrites.
THRASA
PO Box 346
SAN FRANCIA, CA
ENVELOPE OF THE MONTH, Seeburger, Carson City, MI
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