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THE COWBOYS
FROM HELL
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ATCO
Produced & Engineered & Mixed by Terry Date & Viene Paul
CoProduced by PANTERA
8 THRASHER MAGAZINE
to the level of politics. This is
something that many immature
assholes have always tried to do.
Thanks a lot, dirtballs!
Chris Rafferty
There's nothing lower than skaf-
ing, just ask a politician. Ted
SLAPPED SILLY
To all you old-school skaters:
Why don't you quit doing frontside
slappies and four-wheel slides? I
hate those tricks. I nearly broke
my arm trying to do a frontside
slappy when I was making fun of
it. This probably won't be pub-
lished, being that most of you at
Thrasher are old school.
RD in EG
Forget slappies, let's see you do a
Samoan squat. T-ed
PAINT BY NUMBERS
What is with graphics today? I
mean, they used to be cool, but
now they are wimpy cartoon char-
acters that my seven-year-old sis-
ter watches on Sesame Street.
What I would like to know is why
the quality of decks has improved
so much when the belly is still so
butt ugly?
A Confused Skater
Arkansas
The average skateboarder is 10.3
years old. Any questions? T-ed
COLOR BIND
I seriously need your help!
have a pink skateboard with pur-
ple wheels, light blue trucks and
fluorescent grip tape cut into cute
little shapes. My problem is I can't
find the right lipstick and eye
shadow that would go with my
board. It is so embarrassing for
me to clash with my board. Also,
the grip tape is really rough on my
soft skin when I hold it. Do you
have any suggestions?
Candy
Dana Point, CA
Red lipstick, fuschia eye shadow
and potholders. Ted
SPECIAL FORCES
I am a twenty-six-year-old Fed-
eral Agent and fellow skate
boarder who looks and dresses
like I'm eighteen. One day, a few
of the younger skaters and I set
up a portable halfpipe in the park-
ing lot of a friend's store. Minding
our own business, we proceeded
to thrash away the afternoon, until
the local cops showed up. They
read us the Riot Act-everything
from disturbing the peace to tres-
passing. To my surprise, the cop
told us he was going to search us.
As we submitted, his partner start-
ed ripping up my car. He said he
was looking for drugs, and if we
didn't keep quiet he would knock
our teeth out. He called me a punk
and asked me to open the glove-
box. I only wish I could express
the look on the cop's face when
he found my badge and gun-
from "punk" to "I'm sorry, sir." The
rest of the day was eventless.
OLD AS HILL
Damien G.
San Bernardino, CA
How old is Frankie Hill?
Stonehenge
Cumming, GA
Frankie was found frozen in the
Arctic tundra. Experts estimate
his age at about 550 years. T-ed
YANKEE DOODLE DUFUS
I was sitting with my Mom one
day and she said, "Always buy
American-made!" I told her that all
skateboards and skate clothes are
made in America. That made her
a little happier about me skate-
boarding. Chalk one up for skate-
boarders everywhere!
SOUR GRAPES
Alley Cat
Chicago, IL
The other day I was sitting in the
gym and as I drifted off into a sort
of pre-coma doze, a vision came
to mo. I dreamed I had an airgun
with a muzzle velocity of over
5.000,000 FPPS that could propel
a grape fast enough to hit the
Prime Minister of Nagasaki in the
belly button causing an explosion
equivalent to the force of 12 nucle-
ar bombs, 5 atom bombs and ap
proximately 2.73742 hydrogen
bombs, opening up a portal
through time and space that would
transport all of humanity to the 5th
dimension, Zog, where, because
of repeated slams, the immune
system of the skater would better
survive the jolt of violent decom-
pression and instant rematerializa-
tion, causing all but physically.
superior skaters to suddenly
become a glowing green radio-
active goo-bubble. Unfortunately.
Daisy Airgun, Co. hasn't made at
high-power grape-thrower yet, so I
guess we'll just have to wait.
HOT LINE
Eggroll
Palestine, TX
You know how you're always
hearing 911 is a joke? Take it from
me, it's not. Last Wednesday at
noon hour, me and my friend.
called 911 and told them the
school was on fire. We have been
suspended for the next three days
and if I get in trouble again, I'll be
in a foster home. So, don't try it.
Paul
Mt. Horeb, WI
Next time light the fire before you
pull the alarm, dummy. T-ed
High performance: Chris Sonn 1st place NSAPP Skate Zone & BALLS wheels 45mm or 43nen 074 & 104a)
POWELL-PERALTA 30 S. La Patera Lane, Santa Barbara, CA 93117
CHRIS
S
ENN
BALLS