TRADESHOW QUIZ
Another Action Sports Retail
er trade show came and went
in San Diego. Despite the out-
standing performance of Louise
Ravera Balma, who danced,
fought and designed everyone
into the ground at the Rage
party, the most visible moment
had to be Saddam Vitello's
discussion of ethics with show
mogul Caroline Wright. Did Vitel-
lo, citing blatant anti-skate discrimi-
nation, call for a holy war against
ASR? Did Vitello dare to cite the
unfortunate censorship of one
James Muir by ASR in the past?
Doesn't everyone know that Muir
was blamed for a crime he didn't
commit and was once banned
from the show by ASR because
he was too much
of a stand-up
guy to rat out
somebody
else? (Keep in mind.
that the actual perpetra-
tor of the misdeed is a
competitor of Muir's.)
Interestingly enough,
several other industry
moguls such as Fitz-
patrick, Novak, Eng-
blom and Morton
witnessed the con-
frontation. Strangely,
later in the show certain
skate companies were
subjected to Heineken-
fueled missile attacks.
Were these acts a retal-
latory effort launched by
a certain mag/trade show combine?
Were Brad Bonhall and Alan Sey-
mour somehow involved? Or was it a
case of curb dogs being curb dogs? In
a presumably unrelated action, the
Trashmen received the above photo,
purported to be an executive of a cer-
tain trade show/mag corp. Is there no
depth to which these savages won't
plunge? This is obviously a fraudu-
lent document because no one
we know has even seen
anyone at ASR have this
much fun.
Has Steve Schneer
started a war over just
who gets his mug shot?
Are two rival skate card
companies talking Trash
regarding the proper legal
assignment of Schneer's
pictorial image?
M
Which anonymous letter from an
ever-so-obvious distributor is making
the rounds of the industry?
Are certain manus upset over Jake's
new no-holds-barred, junk is junk, if it
stinks it's a skunk review process?
Product Patrol or war...who knows?
Has Jeff Klindt taken to running his
business out of an overcoat? Does he
carry examples of his products in his
coat lining?
Is Wade Speyer's knee undergoing
a rebuild by Jose Canseco's sur
geon? Did Wade recently sign a deal
to do signature model shorts? Did
Omar Hassan also sign? Was Has-
san so pumped by this deal that he
finally passed the driving test for his
license on the third go-around?
Did Richard Novak recently meet
Frank Sinatra Jr. and introduce him-
self as "Donald Duck"?
MISC. MISCHIEF
Are a group of skater/computer hack-
ers systematically messing with the
computer systems of certain major
manus? Did they recently erase
weeks worth of records at one well-
established corporation? Did this corp.
attribute the loss to a power failure?
Reliable sources report that, despite
a recent bad ad and other fallings out,
Alva Skates is back on track with
Tony Alva at the helm. "We're fresh
from the soul," he says. "Straight out
of the garage again."
In a somewhat related deal, Mr. Ed
Reategui steps up to bat, fronting a
new company called "Public Skates."
In a distressing trend, it is noted that
corporate newsletters are currently
replacing zines. But, then again, such
legendary zine masters as Detters,
Blender, Ridgeway, Caballero and
GSD have all found themselves.
involved in the industry. Maybe
skaters in business can elevate the
endeavor and return the sport to the
curbs, back alleys and backyards,
where it belongs.
Why is Miki Vukovich handling out
U.S.S.R. rubles? Was his recent
roots-finding Soviet sidewalk search
such a mind scrambling experience
that the lads at a certain slick zine
now call Vucko "Boris"?
Robert Williams, Greg Escalante
and Sandow Birk were seen recently
near the entrance to the notorious 20
foot Tijuana Flood Control. Williams
claimed to be looking
for a celebrity auto-
graph session following
a hit signing of his lat
est Thrasher cover at
the Diego show.
Were Rincon skate
disciples Luke "A,"
"Terrible Tyler" and
Morgan a.k.a. "The
Mangler" recently ap-
prehended by law en-
forcement types for
11-22-44
ALIAS: TRACKER LARRY
ALIAS: PAPEETE
WHEELS & DEALS
Can it be that the
widely rumored Bones
Brigade effort to clothe
a squadron of fighter
pilots on the U.S.S.
Kennedy aircraft carri-
er is actually true? A
recent internationally
aired TV newscast
showed a certain hot-
shot fighter pilot wear-
ing a P/P "Stroke Our
defending their banked turf against Balls" T-shirt after hours. According to
nude gay invaders?
insiders, those ever popular "Death
From Above Bones aero stickers fea-
turing the swank launching skull are
being employed by fighter crews to
personalize bombs being sent to
Baghdad. Watch for the stickers on
the fuselage of F-14 Tomcats.
Which major surf/skate rag company
is rumored to be under investigation
market, a la "insider trading"? Are a
for alleged manipulations in the stock
Is Pincher Noll building a larger
ramp near Crescent City? Was/is
Noll's father Grey the venerated mas-
ter who rode the biggest wave ever?
Did Jason Lee have to leave his
apartment in a hurry? Was the two-
day notice because of social restraints
that the anal-retentive landlord tried to
Jordan Richter, who was more or
enforce? Whatever happened to
less living there also?
tures the paint-altered Pink Motel pool.
The "Urban Dance Squad" video fea-
Nice grinds. Our apologies to Talldog.
Jones and Ancell, who will no doubt
wreak further commercial havoc paint-
ing the pool again. Motel proprietor
Mr. Monty has become such a major
figure that the Los Angeles Times
society page did a profile on him.
Benzelflex magnate/designer Gary
Benzel was observed at an AZ pipe
session beyond mere art direction,
hanging about 11 o'clock high.
Cancelled, wom, used and abused
Australian stamps featuring Hawk.
McGill and Miller are reportedly going
for $10 each in Cincinnati..
Once again for the record: Morrison,
the accountant, is still at Burleigh,
Perry, the shaper, is at Alan Byme in
Oz and Andrew Currey, the 16-year-
old Australian skate journalist, is now
editor of Slam.
number of sponsored skaters sudden-
ly being cut loose?
Is mysto-magnate Tommy Peter-
son, former world champion speed
skater and contemporary wheel
mogul, quietly backing an associate's
commercial play, as widely rumored?
Clockwise
from Opposite
Page Top
Whoever said
the beach peo-
ple in the
action sports
industry don't
know how to
have a good
time? Photo by
Horst Leitner
Wanted man
Larry Balma
wears a lot of
hats. Tom
Inouye test
drives a new
Airwalk display
bootie. Editor
KT explains his
views on the
vampire/satan/
werewolves
issue. Smug-
gled trade
show Polaroids
show happy
faces, even
though atten-
dance was off
and working
girls were
scarce. Two
able skaters
give El Duce
of the Mentors
a quick sta-
tionary lesson;
be's obviously
got the style
Has Everett Rosecrans tumed into
a full-time training type of guy for the
over-forty competitive mountain bike
circuit? Worse yet, has Squealy by a Stain
Healy, some time Stüssy braintrust
benefactor resumed his rigid training
John
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VIC
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