ASH
ASK AND WE SHALL DECEIVE
Question One-Did Lance Mountain, Sr..
and his wife, Yvette, recently hold a birthday
soirée for their avid skating son Lance
Junior? Were not many of the sport's pro-
fessional elite in attendance? Did Lance
Junior promptly name his gift puppy Susie,
much to Lance Senior's chagrin?
Question Two-Is Don Hoffman quietly
preparing a video with the working title
Paradise Lost? Does this video documentary
chronicle the rise, fall and reign of one
Pipeline Skatepark in Upland, California?
Does vintage footage portray Micke Alba as
a youngster? How about a pre-leather,
pre-tat, pre-musical Salba or an embryonic
Chris Miller?
Question Three-Is a certain large-living.
skate manu holding explicit photos of another
manu? Are these highly
FLJICOLOR
revealing pics ex-
tremely topical? Do.
they show a certain
rabble-rousing out-
law as a member of
On a roll. Below: Spring break at its best has got to
be Bike Week in Daytona Beach, Florida. Brewce
Martin and friend Lisa cruise the strip tandem while
a carload of skatehogs cruise past the Hog Pit on the
main drag. Photos by Tory Boettcher.
the prestigious Mattel Toy Company's skate
team? Is a life-size Barbie doll also evident
in some of the shots, or is
she the former Miss Havana
Cuba? Does the soon-to-be-
smeared manu resemble
Fred Flintstone physically?
Has Mr. Mattel already
perpetrated revenge for this:
dastardly act of credibility
assassination?
THE HOC PIY
mother knows. But what is
even the most enlightened
boarder to make of the
following statistics which were
proudly distributed by staff
members of a "leading" snow
B-zine at the aforementioned
event? Entitled something like
"We are who?" it tells "us"
that "we" are: 1. New to the
slopes; 2. Passionate about.
our sport; 3. Affluent;
4. Consumers; 5. Predom-1
inantly male; and 6. Sixty-five
percent of us choose "skate-
board" as a second sport. Oh
yeah, and "one out of every
5 has a household income.
over $100,000 and the
average dollars spent just on
snow-wear per snowboarder
was over $500"
CRIME & PUNISHMENT VS. LIBERTY &
HARASSMENT
Were/are Messrs. John McCrae, Samuel
Cunningham, Randy Katen, Michael
Cummins, Gary Cross and Hunter Kimball
being hounded by an ever-so-prestigious
Left: Scott Oster and his
best girl at Del Mar.
Photo: Bill Thomas.
Right: Longtime skater,
snowboarder, Fat City
Racing member and
honorary N-Man,
Don Bostick now
finds himself at
the top spot on
the NSA totem
Question Four-Did a certain
ultra-conspicuous manufactur
ing czar actually take out a
healthy loan from a bank, then turn
around and spend the money on
his already abundant classic motor pole.
car collection? Was one of the
automobiles in question a Ferrari
Testarossa? Is a certain bank-
appointed CEO now running both the
company and the Ferrari?
SNOW JOB
Following the recent semi-
authorized Thrasher snow/skate fren-
zied fiasco, everybody and their
Sacramento law firm for allegedly trespass-
ing into and skate damaging a certain posh
swim club's pool? Are figures like $6,995 to
resurface the pool (plus a generous $433
cleaning gratuity) being tossed about? Is
February 11, 1990, being stated as the date
in question? My, my, my...was the pool con-
structed from 14K gold? Will witnesses be
able to prove the innocence of these stalwart
all-American youths? Or will they end up in
the joint breaking rocks for the ever-famous
prison ramp?
More spurious inquiries... Was a legen-
dary V-13 Dogtown historical-type allegedly
observed in a Florida airport holding a brown
paper bag? Did governmental law
enforcement types stop
this skater and ask what
was in the "suspicious"
bag? Did the heavy-duty
street legend calmly state,
"I don't know. I just found
it," then look inside? Did
our hero find the contents
of the bag to be $65,000
cash? Will grateful cops
soon give this fly guy the
money if no one else.
comes forward to claim it?
Is there justice in the world
after all?
TALK 'N ROLL
Did a world class underground rider man-
age to put both his wheels through the
plywood, pull them out and still make a hard
slam rock 'n roll at the San Jose warehouse
ramp? Were not Boyle, Kendall and
Caballero repeatedly pulling wheel ride
aerials off the ceiling beam 9' above the ramp
during the same torrid session?
In a separate and presumably unrelated.
event, has Jeff Grosso been conspicuous-
ly absent from recent Tree (the band) prac-
tice sessions? Apparently, fellow band mates
Ross Goodman, Gavin O'Brien, Corey
O'Brien and Jeff Kendall aren't too per-
plexed. Ray Stevens, who just might have
a clue to Grosso's mysterious whereabouts,
was last seen contorting a hydraulically ac-
tivated semi-andrio-animatronic Mr. T doll
through some hideously obscene positions.
Rumor has it that the Mike Folmer-curated
skateboard exhibition at the Anaheim
Museum may be set to tour. Congratulations
to museum director Herb Pruett for his
foresight and skill in promoting this endeavor.
Wild assignations refer to the unfounded
speculations that top officials at Disney World
are considering retaining Folmer to design
a history of transportation (skate style) exhibit
for their theme park in Japan.
Gitmean meals.
And from our Sergio
Valenti meets Halston on the
way to Gloria Vanderbilt's
house (only to discover that
it was burned to the ground
by Yves San Laurent and
Vera on a dream date) file
...Is Rikki Rockett actually
now designing clothing with
John A. Grigley? Is the line
called (guess what) Old Ghost Designs?
Does Big Daddy "D" actually wear these
fashions around the pad as rumored? For a
tasteful sample/example, consider such
award-winning T-shirt slogans as "Dead
People Are Cool."
Live sample
Left: Album cover art by
Neil Blender for the
Don't Mean Maybe
sampler. Below Left:
Godoy's Knuckle Sand-
wich at home on the
range. Photo: Alicia
Hunter.
Wild times in S.F.
at the record release
party for Goodbye
Gemini in the swill-
house known as the Nightbreak. Not only did
Goodbye Gemini put on a swell show and
record toss, the place was packed and pep-
pered with many skate luminaries, such as
K.J.T., Larry Bertleman, Gavin O'Brien,
Wade Speyer, Red Dog, M.Fo, The Surf
Punks, Christian Hosoi, Caballero, T.G...
Jimmy T. and old punk rock types, including
Jello, Johnny Patterson, Chris Isaac and
ex-members of The Lewd and The Zeros.
For those who haven't noticed. Sergie.
Ventura, Bo Ikeda and Christian himself are
riding for Hosoi's new endeavor, Tuff SKTS.
Said to be in the offing are some Skate-
master Tate/Skipperboy built cruiser class
longboards. (Perhaps certified collector's
gold-an investment in the future?)
Pictured above is the scumbag, lowlite reporter and team manager also known as John B. Hogan (leto. With him is the whitebread,
king head of MTV Adam Curry (night). What follows is a friendly exchange of words that took place during the semi-final qualifying
cellent, what else can I say? John: Have you ever been to a skate contest before? Adam: No, never first time. John You're from
New York? Adam: Yeah, well, Jersey, John: Do they skateboard there? Adam: I skateboard in Jersey I've never been to any place
where they h have quarter pipes and halfpipes. I it in my own swimming pool, though, when it was empty. But I wasn't very suc
cessful Randy Jansen (pictured, Ozzy fist My question, what happened to "Kick Start My Heart from M
from Modey Crue? V
seen that video in a long time. Adam We've been playing so many new ones, but I's get it on for you. You guys must like "Devil
Inside" by INXS John: Actually I was there when they filmed that video in Balboa, CA. Lemme ask you. the future of rock and roll-
where do you see it going in the nineties? Adam: On, man, I hope rock and roll always goes in the direction that you hope & won't
rounds of the NSA/Subway Pro Street Championships in Honolulu. John: What do you think of the skate contest so far? Adam: I Ex-
Crue? We haven't
go. That's what it's all about. John: The record industry, is it a good thing? Adam I think if you're making millions of dollars in the
record business it's a good thing, for the people in charge John Any bands you see as up-and-coming for the nineties? Adam Faith
No More and Baton Rouge. I'd say those two for right now. John: All right, enjoy the rest of the contest. Don't sign too many autographs
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