Skarfing
Material
With Chef Boy-Am-I-Hungry
证
HOLY CATS! WHO MESSED WITH
THE HEADLINE?
There I was, surrounded by two, maybe
three of the suckers, heck I don't know,
there were too many to count. I could tell
they were from somewhere I'd been once
before and had absolutely no intention of
going back, but what were they doing here?
"Where do you think you're going?" the
littlest one said, his shirt folding a bit as he
shoved me in the chest.
"Don't jar my memory like that," I said,
disdainfully as I backed up the hill trying to
suck a corn kernel skin from between two
of my teeth.
"Hey, where do you think you're going?"
the biggest guy said. He was bigger than
me.
I took two more steps back - "Aren't you
some of those Grateful Dead concert
people?" and stupidly into a wall. Then
all of a sudden one of them smashes me
in the face with a short piece of two-by-four,
causing a turning point in the situation.
Everybody knows that when you're hit in
the face with a two-by-four your eyes in-
stantly start seeing nothing for a brief
period of time, something like two seconds.
Being against the wall I couldn't fall down.
As soon as the old eyes began to distin-
guish shapes once again, the first thing:
they saw was a fist coming from the big
guy which landed on the unstricken side of
my face. Instantly I suspected these guys
wanted something and weren't gonna leave
right away. This cornered animal feeling
sprang through me, I lept up, unleashed
and made...
COLESLAWS OUDOVDEM
The days have gotten warmer and it's
about time to make some cooler tasting
dishes that you can shove past yo' lips,
down yer throat and into yer gut. Here's two
A-OK directs for excellent additions to any
skarf-sess.
18
If you're not one to get ganged up on, you might like to try some zesty new
coleslaws to help you jump higher. Zombie session at Montague banks.
"FLOWER UP THE TAIL OF HELL"
COLESLAW
This was named after a line in a Bukowski
novel, and it's fun. Set yourself up with:
about a quart of shredded cabbage
• a green pepper, diced
grate the hell out of a carrot
1 cup buttermilk
1 teaspoon dry mustard
• 1 teaspoon vinegar
•2 teaspoons salt
4 teaspoons sugar
O-tay, mix the vinegar, salt, sugar, pep-
per, buttermilk and mustard. Dump it on top
of the cabbage, carrot and green pepper
and mix. If you want, throw some olives in
there if you're one of those people.
MUMMIFIED BABY PLAYING
WITH LIVING RED LICORICE
COBRAS COLESLAW
This was named after a painting I did that
bears no resemblance in any way to this
dish, and I don't know why. Here's how it's
Photo: Babs.
done, and don't throw any rocks through
any windows.
2 bunches of fresh spinach (washed and chilled)
• 1 cup plain yogurt
% teaspoon pepper
¼ teaspoon celery seeds
½ teaspoon garlic powder
½ teaspoon dillweed
½ teaspoon salt
With your fingers, break the spinach up
into real little pieces so it's easy to put in
your mouth and won't wipe on your chin or
the side of your mouth. Mix all the rest of
the ingredients, dump it onto the spinach.
and toss it with a bad attitude.
BUY
If you don't buy my SKARFING MATE-
RIAL SHARK TACO RECIPE T-SHIRTS I'm
gonna kill an elephant and throw it at you.
Only $9.65 (postage and handling in-
cluded) c/o THRASHER MAGAZINE,
SKARFING MATERIAL T-SHIRT, P.O. Box
884570, San Francisco, CA 94188-4570.
Skater Aaron Murray
DOGROWN SKATED
PO BOX 5512 VENICE CA 90296
RO.
(213) 396-6722