TRASH
NEW FRIENDS
W
hile lurking around the
UCI gnar block at four in
the morning, Heath Kirchart
decided that something just was-
n't quite right, and he severed his
sponsorship with Hook-Ups
shoes. Let the bidding war begin!
Although it was reported last
month that Kris Markovich was
in talks with DVS, it appears the
tattooed titan will actually be get-
ting a shoe on Puma.
Speaking of ink, Zero's Adrian Lopez seems
to have followed his boss' lead and has
acquired, in quick succession, several large
tattoos of the forearm variety. Rumors of a
"Garfield playin' a banjo" tat are thought to be
largely false.
Meanwhile, back at Duffs, Matt "Second
Coming" Mumford will be designing his own
pro shoe, which, if recent skating is any indi-
cator, will allow the wearer to grind any rail,
provided it's 16 stairs or more.
After shopping his talents around in vain,
Frank Garcia Hirata may be about to launch
his own board company. The quickfooted lover
of ferrets has also relocated from Vista to
Orange County.
In car news, Rob Gonzalez traded in his
WHERE'S KIRBY?
Richard Kirby sure came and went.
Call NHS and ask what happened.
beloved '84 Datsun Sentra (AKA the Silky
Sentra) for a '99 Rodeo, while in Oceanside,
Daxter Lussier went against everyone's
advice and bought a spankin' new Kia
Sportage. And in the less-than-high-rollin'
department, Dave Coyne has not yet returned
from Ohio, as he is driving back in his mom's
old '92 Saturn.
Alex "Train Wreck" Gall is reported to
have gone through some 17 boards in two
weeks after being placed on the Zero flow pro-
gram. Faulty wood? Bad concave? Try the fact
that Gall weighs in excess of 210 pounds and
is still growing.
All those baton twirls have paid off, as
Mathias Ringstrom recently purchased a
house in the spendy Encinitas area, near fellow
homeowner Bucky Lasek.
Congratulations to Chad Knight and his
fianceé Nicole, who are expecting a baby. The
couple are set to wed in December.
Vancouver devil Jake Stewart has left
Platinum and is turning pro for Media.
SHIT STORM
It is not about the money. It is about hanging
with your clan in a contained controlled police-
supervised environment in the shadow of a
sewage treatment plant. Hometown man Ed
Templeton claimed that the Triple Crown
World Championships in Huntington Beach
were also downwind of the fecal processing
facility. The smell was at times pungent. But the
series of contests was freely accessible to the
public. The skating was real and the prize
money was there too. An event held where
skaters live and congregate is obviously more
appealing than a made-for-TV drama in which
the audience are little more than props and
unpaid extras.
Several veterans of the NBC Gravity fiasco
seemingly complained about what in their esti-
mation was the network's "dramatic overstate-
ment of actual amounts awarded" in Rhode
Island. What, there are promoters who do not
disclose all of the facts? We were shocked to
discover that some of the corporate non-rider
types who are fronting these deals actually are
doing it to make a profit.
The local law enforcement consortium
tossed, escorted, and rousted several repre-
sentatives of a non-corporate-supported mag
who were unfortunate enough to have come
to witness the HB contest. Mic-E Reyes
claimed that "the tactics were obviously polit-
ically inspired. Can't we all get along, can't we
learn to respect our differences?" (We hope
Reyes was making a humorous comment.)
Cops and lifeguards were surprised when
Jimmy Fitzpatrick led a tour of the under-
neath side of the porta soul bowl. It seems
that when the Fire Marshal closed down the
stands because of safety concerns he did not
anticipate that Fitz would show the crowd
how to find the way to the secluded Plexiglas
viewing ports located under the bowl's belly
and the "dangerously overloaded stands."
Ganzer, who was back from the dread, plied
the crowd with promotional T-shirts in hom-
age to the seventies. Ridge looked surprised
when Hawk showed up unannounced and
qualified on the spot. Mountain's hopes of a
Firm sweep fell apart shortly thereafter. Cab
added more money to his $2600 Japanese
HEROES RULE
Mimicking your
favorite pro has
been a pastime
of skaters since
day one. Check
Lester's clone
with the Hosoi
autograph.
game show winnings and his $2500 G Games
award by taking the top old bowl prize, fol-
lowed by Grosso and Mike Smith. Vert saw.
Tony take, 15g and McKay get 8g, succeeded
by Andy Mac receiving 5g. Matt Beach won
the street and was awarded 15 thousand.
Koston placed second, earning 8 thou, and
Chet Thomas scored third and 5 grand.
TIME OUT
A perplexing sub-text was observable in the
official billing of the aforementioned event.
What was once generally known as the Vans
Hard Rock World Championships now seems
to being subtly changed into the Vans Triple
Crown. Some astute viewers claim that this
marks the buy-in of Casio G Shock into the
marquee position. So what does that have to do
with anything? Keep tuned.
Barry McGee, the prominent artist, was in
LA visiting collector Dean Valentine and
laboring on a piece at the Armand Hammer
Museum. He thus was coincidentally on hand
to allegedly witness the aftermath of the
wholesale bombing of the Malibu pier by some
unknown graffiti artist. The offending graff was
promptly removed by contractors who were
rumored to be working for the State of
California, who owns the pier. By the next day,
unnamed art expertos de cultura, who apparent-
ly thought this spray-painted vandalistic excess
was the work of Twist, were heard to be offer-
ing thousands of bucks for the pieces. The
newspapers, cops, rangers, and Malibu judici-
ary all seem to have gotten into the act too.
McGee was not confused, he was just gone.
In order to be confused, Andy Mac institut-
ed a preemptive stunt strike just prior to the
MTV Sports and Music Festival, in cahoots
with Swatch, the Guinness Book of World
Records, and Team Pain. At a not so secret
site in lurid Lansing, Michigan, Mr Mac set
several new world's record marks assisted by
a custom ramp featuring a 41-foot roll-in
extension and a ten-foot kicker hump at the
bottom. For the record, the new marks are:
distance, 52 feet 10 inches. Cars, four. 360°
grab, 41 feet. Kickflip melon grab, 29 feet.
CROSS TRAINING
smokestack. The unhinged
shoe king is said to also be qui-
etly doing his own Web site
that is not directly affiliated
with the Vans corporate com-
pany. The rumors are that
Steve is doing this to prove the
viability of his personally
designed 1966 slip-on shoe in
the modern marketplace. Such
individuals as Ice T and Geoff
Rowley have been also seen in
the vicinity of oddly colored
Van Doren created retro treads
in the past few weeks.
Chad Muska might jump trains, but he'll never jump ship. RIOT SQUAD
Credit goes out to Nick Hayek, Bob,
Bernthal, and all the Swatch henchmen who
appear determined to wage battle with both G
Shock and the assorted network forces on as
many fronts as possible.
SHOW STEALER
Are the shareholders of the monolithic K2
cartel closely monitoring the performance of
Adio? Is it viewed in the corporate pantheon as
the next big hit? Will the undue scrutiny of the
corporate types end up changing the course of
another successful skate enterprise? Is it possi-
ble that skater-run businesses work precisely
because they do not follow the standard dic-
tates and practices of the MBA mob? K2 is
rumored to have invested approximately 5 mil-
lion dollars so far into skate-oriented deals.
Mark "I'm Married Now But Everything is
the Same" Gonzales discovered the "perfect
sculpture" in Berlin. The aesthetic qualities of
the Julius Caesar monument there and "the
way the hard German light falls across it" have
inspired Mark to alert all of his artistic compa-
triots. Jocko Weyland got so excited over
Gonz's description of Caesar's patination that
he quit his job in New York and went there.
Watch for a Levi Strauss-subsidized museum
tour of arte de Gonz at venues in London, New
York, Japan, and Australia.
Steve Van Doren, the titular head of the
Vans logo, proved his mettle by infiltrating
the HB water treatment plant's security zone
and hanging giant banners with his name
emblazoned on them from the top of the
HALL OF MEAT
Andy Bollinger
does the noodle
dance with his
arm. "Two metal
plates and seven
screws; but I
broke it again,
so they gave me
bigger ones."
Too bad. He
can't skate until
next summer.
The Battle of Los Angeles
broke out on Wilshire Boulevard on the pristine
stretch of polished terrazzo known as the
Miracle Mile. The release of Rage Against
the Machine's latest CD took place there on
the traditional Mexican holiday of El Día de los
Muertos. Translated literally as Day of the
Dead, you can readily see how this is the ideal
celebration in which to drop a new offering
from Rage. It is an ancient pre-Columbian
belief that on this day the veil parts, separating
the boundaries between the realm of the living
POSER
OF THE
MONTH
Foul: Barf
Puker: Pete
Punishment: Dishes
and that of the dead. Thousands of Angelenos
put on their dead costumes, built altars in
homage to the departed, and partied for days
with the souls of the departed. The band
played the little El Rey Theater towards the
end of the week-long fiesta which naturally
attracted scores of both the living and the
dead. Amongst the live folk who got in to the
very small hall were Bobby Hilburn, Zach
de la Rocha, Skipperboy, Tom Morello,
Victor Moreno, Brad Wilk, Miguel
Leonis, and Tim Commerford. Amongst
the hundreds who didn't were scores of
skaters who rode Wilshire's highest priced
real estate and interfaced with the LAPD
metro tactical elite. Police personnel are
again reviewing video surveillance footage in
an effort to identify some of the "trespassing.
riders." Caught in the crossfire were a group
of Sony Music executives who seemed driven.
to sign certain members of Rage
to solo contracts. Epic record
company execs who were also on
the scene did not give off the
impression of happiness over the
Sony guys' presence there. So no one
knew who to blame when the limo got`
towed away.
PASTURE TIME
At the end of Hawk's run at the Triple Crown he
stated "you will never see that again." So Tony went
off to Vegas for MTV and did a demo on the Martin
Short Show. Now there is an apparently actual photo-
graph making the rounds that depicts Tony Hawk
with his arm around Monica Lewinsky. An accom-
panying message signed by Anthony F Hawk relates,
"Let it be known that Ms Lewinsky and I did have a
brief encounter on the night in question. After engag-
ing in friendly conversation we posed for a photo-
graph and then parted our separate ways shortly
thereafter. I have had no further contact with that
woman. In other words: We got close, but no cigar."
MONEY MONEY
"For that kind of money I would
I have painted it myself." -Barry
McGee
"Gonz is the people's choice to
be the new Basquiat."-
Glen Friedman
The worlds hottest skater ever.