ON BOARD
Fun Box
What's worse than having sex with Jack the Ripper?
Getting fingered by Captain Hook.
A brother and sister had just got done having sex. "Wow," said the
sister. "You're better than dad." "I know," said the brother. "That's
what mom told me too."
How do you confuse a blonde?
Put her in a round room and tell her to pee in the corner.
-Amanda Walker, Berryton, KS
Pinocchio is giving his girlfriends splinters when he has sex with
them. He asks Geppetto what to do, who tells him to sand down
those parts of his dick. A few days later, they meet again, and
when Geppetto asks him how it's working out, Pinocchio replies,
"Who needs girlfriends?"
-Max Powers, Brookline, MA
Why don't old women wear belts?
They can't tighten them because their tits get in the way.
Why can't a man eat like a bird?
You ever try picking up food with your pecker?
Poet's Corner
King of the Session
Waiting patiently, for a path to clear
It's time now to get rid of the fear
Jump on your board, push hard and fast
Try not to think about the arm in the cast
Approach the obstacle thinking of that one thing
If you land this trick, you'll feel like a king.
-Christopher Lynn, Topeka, KS
Criminals?
I cruise down the parking lot.
But found by the cops screaming, "Stop!"
I jam the scene nearly caught
Am I a criminal? I think not!
What's with this shit?!
We're not below the law or above it.
We skate for fun, because we love it.
Why are we treated like we are?
Nearly missed by a car,
I think it through of who we are.
I think and think and think some more
But this thought begins to bore
I don't understand it, probably never will
Why are we treated like this?
What's the big deal?!
-Amber Atkisson, Ventura, CA
Reality
A cool guy is skateboarding in a parking lot.
He sees a cop and thinks "I might get caught,"
For when you see a man in blue,
You should start a petition,
And he's staring grimly at you,
Then maybe they'll leave us alone,
So the cops'll quit bitchin'.
Blind
FIRING LINE: LAVAR MCBRIDE
GABRIEL RODRIGUEZ
NOSE SUDE LOS ANGELE
ERMAR
Age? 18
R
How old were you when you started skating? 7, but I got
serious when I was 8
GAL
LTON
RODRIGUEZ
Who's better, you or your brother? I don't know. I don't
really think about it like that
EEFE
DAE
ESON
5 Greats
5 Hates
1. Broken kingpins
3. Slipped axles
2. Blown out bushings
4. Stripped nuts
5. Blown out bearings
-Todd Henry, Oxford, PA
5 Rest In Peace Greats
1. Sid Vicious (Sex Pistols)
2. Darby Crash (Germs)
Sponsors? Blind, Elwood
Home turf? San Francisco.
3. Dave Insurgent (Reagan Youth)
4. Stiv Bators (Dead Boys)
5. Chris Smith (Battalion of Saints)
-Derek Turner, Colorado
Flip trick you can land every time? Kickflip
Favorite mag? Thrasher
Favorite food? Cheeseburger
Favorite female? A lot of girls look good
Height? I don't know
Favorite shoe? Axion
Favorite skater? Alex Lee
Have you ever cried at a contest? Not
physically, but emotionally, yeah
Favorite photographer? Tobin
Trick you've made once, but will never do
again? Switch 180° pressure flip over the 7
STEALTH
148 THRASHER
'Cause they could be sleeping at home
Instead of making us go away,
When they know we'll be back another day.
They just have to take our fun away
And kick us out of Circle K.
A cop pulls up when he's ollieing a gap
Then he thinks "they need to stop this crap."
-Ben Smith, Debary, FL
5 Greats
1. Templeton
5 Things That Suck
1. Homie-G skaters
2. Vallely
2. Rocks
3. Muska
4. Senn
5. Uncle Jer
-Dave | Haman
3. Rain.
4. Broken bearings
5. Trendies with DC Shoes (no holes!)
-Dave | Haman
5 Greats
1. Beer City 8 plys
2. Indy trucks
3. Spitfire wheels
4. Bones bearings
5. Black Magic griptape
-Todd Henry, Oxford, PA
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