I like a lot of war movies like Hamburger Hill, A
Bridge Too Far. I liked The Truman Show, even
though a lot of people might say that movie sucks.
What was your first girlfriend like?
First girlfriend was like, an hour. We were walking
around the block and then after that we broke up.
And that was the end of that?
Yeah. I'll just talk about my one and only, Evelyn.
So you've been going out with your girl for
five years?
Yeah.
he is. A lot of kids' first impression of him is like,
"Wow, this guy is going to beat me up." Once you
get to know him, he still might beat you up, but
he's still cool.
Have you ever ridden a horse?
No, but I know they're edible. Just kiddin'
What's the grossest thing you've ever acciden-
tally eaten?
A cockroach in some soup. I was at this Chinese
food restaurant and I'm about to eat this soup and
I'm like, "These herbs look really good." And then
What pushes you to skate?
Mainly my back foot. Sometimes my front. Nah,
only my back. No really, when I go to a spot and
see all the kids having fun.
Why do you still live at home?
I still live at home because you save a lot of
money. Also, my parents are separated and I want
to be with my father s long as he's around. I want
to be around him. It's good at home. I've got my
sister, my brother, my father. As long as my
father's around, I don't want him to have to live.
Left: Tippie-toe control on a stylish backside noseblunt slide. Above: The height at which this backside nollie heelflip is caught will be even more
surprising when you hear that the runway is uphill, the path narrow and the bump largely imaginary-stickin' it at the West High underflip gap.
"If you walk out of his house, you've got people
with baseball bats and forties in their hands."
"What?" So I grabbed another piece of candy and
it rang up at $7.01.
Did you still eat the candy?
Yeah.
Have you ever been to a waterpark?
I used to always go to Raging Waters, go on
Drop Out and pick a Murphy half up my ass. One
time I was on this ride called Roaring Rapids and
I went over the waterfall and my feet were stuck in
the inner tube and my head was in the waterfall
and I'm like, "blughhh," and I couldn't move and
the water was going all in my face. I thought I was
going to drown and then the next tube person
comes along and they bumped me. And then they
got the waterfall treatment. Another time, they
had this kiddie land. And you know, you want to
be macho at the water park, 'cause there's all these
girls in bikinis walking around. And when you're a
little kid, you want to be extra macho. So I was
trying to go down the slide standing up. All I
remember was I went down standing up, and I
made it to the end and then I slipped and head-
butted the slide. I think it was like two twelve-
year-old girls in swimsuits who picked me up. It
was pretty bad. They were all, "Are you all right?"
and I jumped up real fast and was like, "Yeah." My
whole macho outlook since then has changed.
And no more standing up down water slides.
66 THRASHER
What's the best birthday party you ever had?
The best birthday party was when I didn't have
a birthday party. I don't know. I'm not really that
fond of birthday parties. I don't like that feeling
where everybody's around you and some people.
didn't bring you presents and they're like, "Hey.
I didn't get you nothin', but I will." And other
people who brought one are like, "I hope you
like it." And then the people who barely know
you are like, "Should I have brought something?"
I don't like that whole feeling where everybody's
worried they should've or would've or could've
done something for you on your birthday. The
last birthday party I remember was when some-
one threw a pie at my face and then said happy
birthday. I think my girlfriend had her hand on
the pie too.
How old were you?
It's when I turned twenty-one. I'm twenty-three
now. We were at the Olive Garden, pie in my face. I
remember I forgot how whipped cream smelled after
it's been stuck on your face. So later that night, after
my party, I didn't feel like taking a shower before I
went to bed. So I'm sleeping, and I kept smelling barf.
And I kept looking at my girl going, "Damn! Shit. Oh
no, you? No." And we tried to go back to sleep and
I'm finally like, "Evelyn, I smell barf." And she's like,
"I know, you stink." And I'm like, "It ain't me!" It
turns out it was because I had whipped cream
behind my ears. And we had been out for like five
hours since the pie and you know how milk gets
after it's been sitting out? So it was like five hours of
milk sitting on my ear, and I smelled that all night.
Have you ever had a bad experience at the dentist?
Yeah, him saying, "You need twenty fillings." And
me like, "OK, great," and then getting the shot and
not being able to eat for three days. Or when he's
got his hand in your mouth and the fine assistant
comes in and you're all like, "Oh shit!," and she's
like, "Wow," and then walks out.
What was some of the best gear you had
growing up?
The best gear? Qh man, I'd have to say, one
morning I needed shoes real bad on the way to
school. This was in the sixth grade and all these
kids had like Pumas and Nikes and I went to Boy's
Market, which was like a food market, and I
bought some Pro Jogs, and I slapped them babies
on-blue canvas with a white stripe across it. And
I got to school. "Damn, what kind of shoes are
those?" "Man, these are Pro Jogs." "Like Pro
Wings?" I go, "They're not Pro Wings!" Acted all
offended. "They're not Pro Wings, they're Pro
Jogs! Much better than Pro Wings!"
What are some of your favorite movies?
Shawshank Redemption. That movie's really good.
Was there anything you were really scared of
when you were a kid?
I used to be afraid of this when I was a kid and it
never happened to me until recently and that is
when you have a runny nose and you're talking
and you decide to take nice deep breath and
breathe back out and this huge booger bubble
comes out of your nose and then shoots back in,
while you're making an order at a restaurant. And
then the person taking the order pretends they
didn't see it.
Talk about your friend Shiloh.
Kids got to understand that Shiloh's got a lot of
talent. He's been through some hard times, and he
went to prison for a while, but he's back out now
and skating a lot. All the kids will learn how good
I saw legs. There was a huge cockroach in it.
But you didn't actually eat it though?
No, but I tasted it.
Have you ever rescued any animals?
Yeah, I rescued a bird, but then I forgot to feed it
for two weeks. So I guess I didn't really rescue it.
What as your first skateboard?
My first skateboard was a snakeboard from
Gemco that got stolen, then my second board was
the more advanced Nash Executioner. Then I
went on to higher rankings with my new G&S
Billy Ruff.
Is your hair pretty stiff?
It's hard. It's so hard sometimes it throws up
signs. I have to keep it stiff. I need to keep the
nest down!
alone, like a lot of other parents. I might try and
get a place soon, but I'll still go and visit every day.
Are you a spiritual man?
Actually I haven't been to church in a while, but
I do keep a Bible in my car.
Do you think it will protect you like an airbag?
I used to think that, but I need to read more. Next
tour, I'll read more because there's nothing to do
on a fifteen hour plane ride. I go to a Bible study
class on Thursday nights, whenever I can make it.
I'm not any religion. I guess I'm more Christ-like.
What TV shows do you like?
"Simpsons," like every other nutcase. I also like.
"Mad About You," don't ask me why. Hey, I just
like it. It reminds me of me and my girl.
67