STUMPED IN TAMPA
PHOTOGRAPHS STORY MICHAEL BURNETT
"Sure. I'll get you a ticket on the
Greyhound. Ruff, Ruff!"
Filthy can be a real smart-ass when he wants
to. Fuckin' Old School.
But Riley kept on him. I was glad too, 'cause
even though I don't yap about it all the time
like Riley, I sometimes think I could take out
some of those video dudes.
About four days later, Riley had Filth on the
ropes. He finally agreed to borrow his folks'
Winnebago and take me, Riley, Lil' Tim, and
Robby to Tampa.
Tampa, dude! I felt all goofy when I heard
he starts telling us about the time he partied
with Jeff Grosso, or Duane Peters, or some
shit back in the day, or the time he was on the
Alva B-team. Old School!
The night before we left, I tried to sleep.
but kept imagining my lines. Fuckin' flat bar!
What the hell was I gonna' do on the flat
bar? How high is that thing? As soon as I'd
start to get tired, tricks would get in my
head again and my hands and feet would
start sweating.
The trip took forever thanks to Lil' Tim run-
ning laps around the inside of the
sessions before, but nothing like the hun-
dred-plus shit that was happening in that
crazy warehouse.
"Dude! Look, it's Bam Margera!" Riley prac-
tically screamed right in the dude's face. "And
there's Rick McCrank!"
"Chill, chill!" I told him. Riley's my boy, but
he needs to take the dork level down a notch.
I mean, you can't be hollering in people's faces
like they're Party of Five or something.
We noticed a few others from the videos
and mags like Elissa Steamer, Satva Leung,
Wil Taylor, Mike Maldonado, Malcolm
Watson, and Danny
Gonzalez. Then when I
looked at the sign-up
sheet, recognized
almost half the
names. Everyone was
there! It was like the
amateur showdown of
the decade.
We went back into the
shop and saw Filthy
KOAIRWALK
APCAIRWALK
FAR EAST
new deat Element
PERIGE Element
ZERO ZARIGE
Element
9000
Left: Greg Hiler
goes 187 on this
high frontside
ollie to rail. Seq:
Tony Trujillo uses
the vert ramp as
God intended, to
get onto the
street course.
The fax came rolling into The Board Ranch in a sputter of paper and
Riley grabbed it before I could even get my hands on it.
"It's Tampa Dude! The Am contest is coming up!" he yelped at me
as I read it at the exact same time. Riley's always doing that shit. His
favorite thing is to repeat shit he reads in Trash as though he heard
it firsthand.
"You've already told me three times," I have to tell him. "Yes, Riley, I
can read the magazines too." Jesus.
The biggest amateur contest in the country-I'd seen the photos and
the footage of last year's event and it looked pretty sick. I mean, some of
those kids were busting out and nobody'd even heard of them before,
és és és és etnies
kind of like me and Riley and the rest of the Board Ranch team.
It's not that we're just some hicks, even though some of the pros
seemed to think so when they did a demo in our parking lot last sum-
mer. I tried to prove otherwise when I busted a fat 360° flip right over
the same gap they were trying. It's weird. They didn't seem stoked or
nothin'. It's not that I'm about showing off though. We keep it pretty
real and all. Shit, to get co-sponsored by C.R.P. Shoes you must be
doing something right. We also proudly use King Cobra Hardware, if
anyone wants to know.
So Riley started begging "Filthy" Rich, the owner of the Board Ranch,
about taking the team to Tampa.
the news, but I played it off. I sure didn't start
jumping off the counters like Lil' Tim. I can be
chill when I have to.
Filth pretended like he was pissed, but you
know he was psyched too.
"You think they'll have an unsponsored divi-
sion?" he asked, with that hopeful look in his
eye. It's the same look he always gets when
Winnebago. Don't give that kid no donuts!
Not to mention that the thing would only go
about 50 miles an hour. The beats were on,
until Filth pulled out his damn Judas Priest
tape. Then the headphones went on.
I'm gonna' admit right now, I was scared
when I peeped the shit going down on
that street course. I've been in some heavy
Brian
talking to
Schaefer, the guy who
owns the park. It
seemed that Brian had
never heard of King
Cobra Hardware. Shit!
It's just the strongest
bolts available in the
whole Midwest!
The next thing you
know, Filthy's cheap.
ass didn't want to pay
the $50 entry fee for
each of us. After some
debate, well, more like Riley
throwin' a fit, it ended up just me and him
were gonna' get to enter. Lil' Tim and
Robby were gonna' play cheerleader, which
is perfect for Tim, seeing as he was out
front hosing down Jamie Thomas about
how he could have made the Leap of Faith
gap, switch. Shit, give that kid a nap!
We signed up-numbers 168 and 169 on
I WAS SCARED WHEN I PEEPED THE SHIT GOING
DOWN ON THAT STREET COURSE