White Fathers of Africa
YAttempted Interview by
Arnold Corns:
OK, Hare, tell us the
date.
Un. it's the 14th of
February, 1997. Hey,
it's Valentine's Day.
how about that?
Happy Valentine's. Do
you have a date tonight?
No.
Where are the ladies?
Everywhere but here.
Everywhere and nowhere.
wonen drag you down.
True enough, true
enough. How do you feel
today?
Tired. I slept too.
long. I love to sleep.
It's a shane that too
nuch is a bad thing.
What about lately? What
have you been doing?
What do you think?
Skateboarding. Oh, er, I
mean, filming. I don't
skate anymore. Arnold,
you ask shitty ques-
tions.
It's for the kids!
R Little Timmy and Bally
and Tiny Timi
10 CUCKOO
DO-IT-YOU CLOCK
Well, yeah, you might say that, and, yeah, money shouldn't matter, but
when people are using your name and making money off you, using you, then you
should get a share of that money too. Professional skateboarders shouldn't
center their lives around the dollar, but when you have to film constantly
and do demos and contests, and your body gets destroyed, and the company guys
sit back behind their desks collecting all that money you made them, you
should get something in return, not just a sweatshirt and a new set-up.
ety in Africa
Spine & Brothers
Painting here and
there, writing novels,
doing laundry. But I
love filming the most.
You know, people callingi
you for footage two
months after their last
video cones out. Video
is killing skateboard-
ing, taking the fun
re away. I think we're
doing this backwards.
m Don't they want to know
Lils all of my personal info?
ng
I guess so. You're
right.
TIS Well, too bad.
Just some hun drum
836 stuff. Let's see, how
ade old are you?
I've been on this
earth a little over
7.300 days. Can you do
long division?
Hot right this moment.
How do you like it so
I don't have a
choice, do I? I can't
W complain. I'm doing wha
as I love to do. And I eve..
wl skateboard sonetines
eh
too. You can't get out
going backwards, you
have to go forward to
est get back. Better press
ait on. I'm thankful for
everything I have and
try not to take absolutely anything
tio for granted. You all have been great.
con I love you and good night.
Uh, sarth to Hare, do you read me?
How you doin', baby?
Where were you born?
I was born in Morganton. North
carolina. Grace Memorial Hospital. I'm
adi from North Carolina. You want to hear
wil a crazy story? OK, when I was two
to years old, one day my parents went to
the grocery store, and I went with
them, as kids sometimes do. Well, they
Stell me we were in the dairy section
30 of Kroger, I think. So, I'm in the
lp shopping cart, and this other couple
MACH URSET
AIR RIFLE
came along and took me out of the cart
and out of the store. They took me to
Virginia. So, I spent three years with
them, and then when I was five, they
tried to enroll me in pre-school, but.
they had no pink slip for me, no reg-
istration, you know, birth certificate.
and all. They claimed it was lost in a
fire or something. So, the school gets
suspicious and calls the police, and
this whole crazy ordeal went down. It
took a while, but I was traced back to
my parents. It worked out. Crazy, huh?
Are you serious? I didn't know that I
You're bullshitting
I sort of remember it, though, the
kidnappers.
ADDS YOUR BIKE MILES
SO Bea 4255
4444444
djustable
bring a
Well, when I
fire, this New was sixteen,
all the superb
mance feature some friends of
der or with mine who had
sha
oveć
to 5
es
repr
ROC
bee California the
ine year before.
returned. Werts a
AIR were at a party,
and one of then
told me there
was an open seat on
the way back. That
was Saturday night. S
On Sunday I told my
mon I was moving to
California. She had
nothing to say. So,
on Monday, I withdrew
from the eleventh
grade, and
Tuesday, we left.
That was November 15
or 16, 1993.
Excerpt from
Attempted Interview
with RF Hinkle
You don't chill? You
just skate when the
camera comes out?
Fuck! So many
people want footage
for a new video that
it's getting that
way-but, the other.
way around, the cam-.
era comes out when I
skate. The camera
creeps in the bush-1
es, I tell you.
Sonsuhbitches!
DU
R3
EN
"LIL" INDIAN M
STAIRS AND-A+Use
FY JELLY MAKE A
tsiDE NOS Suice Piss
FreAL BAD
BOYS LIFE for
Shut the fuck up! You remember it?
Vaguely. Not any different, though,
almost as one entire memory. Like
mixed in with memories of non and dad,
dear ol dad.
Man, are you bullshitting? That's
fucked up, dude. That's so fucked up!
I had you going, though. Ahh, haaa!
Pretty fast, huh?
Fuck you, man. I don't want to talk to
you no more. This interview is over.
Yeah, it's time for a shower. I
think I'll take a shower, start the
It's 2:44 in the afternoon!
Oh, well.
OR
Journal
SEND $1 FOR BIG
"Go right, he told me..
I took a right and drove.
This place was EVIL. Things
have happened here. John
started telling us stories
of albinos and death and
hell. This area and the
road made Stevens Canyon
look like a residential
street. I got the chills a
hundred times worse. I was
worried something tragie
and freaky was going to
happen. Along the road
there were many turns, but
one had a crazy sign.
Journal
So, I called her
tonight and told her no
more. I had to call it
quits. Everything with
her is so wrong. She is
the temptation in my
life, everything that
gets in the way. She's
the hand on your shirt,
always slowing you
down. She's the slow
drivers when you're
late for everything
that matters, the red
lights that never seen
to go green. I can't
take anymore of this.
Pets Is Dumber
AMERICANS
We hit the dog and squirt lemon juice in
its eyes when it's bad. We rub its nose in
shit and chain it to the tree and lock it in
the kennel. We cage the birds and argue back
and forth about the dumbest shit. We bring fish
and birds and dogs and cats and this and that
into our homes so we can stare at them and have
something great to talk about when friends come
over. We take freedom away from everything just
to suit our every wish. "Oh, gee, doesn't that
snake look cool? Gee, he looks so happy in that
shoe box! we take things from their homes and
trap them in our homes and hit them when they
don't like it. It makes such perfect fucking
sense. Gosh, we are snart.
Yeah, when I was younger,
as a form of punishment-for
getting a B on a test, for
example-my mother would take
away whatever was my favorite
thing at the time
When it came time to take
the skateboard away,
something inside of me
snapped, and I threw it
at her head. You should
have seen her face. I
asked her, "Every time I
get good at something.
you take that away? Why?"
She used to make fun of
the way I looked. Sone
people get a sick sense
of pleasure in holding
you back, frustrating
you, and then watching
your face for the
results. People are like
that.
IN HEAVEN, everythinje 15 FINE,
YOU GOT YOUR GOOD THINGS AND VE
GOT MINE. FAKIE KICKFLIP FAKIE 5-0.
At this point, this thing
should be done, so I would.
like to say hello and thank
you to Ruben Orkin at
Thunder trucks, Jeff Kendall
at Direction Wheels, Jake
and Carl at Edward
Sebastian. Thanks to Mark
Oblow for giving me Speed
Demons bearings. Hi, Mark!
Hello and thanks to Alex, Adrian, and Mike at NC
Boardshop. Thanks to Steve and Don at Emerica. Hello
to the Maple team: Dave Mayhew, Jason Carney, Kien
Lieu, Chad Knight, and our new am Jerry Hsu. And to
the guys at Maple Skateboards: Steve, Ed, Zach,
Charlie, Jim, Mikey, and Brody. I love you guys.
Thank you for everything. And thank you to Rodney
Mullen for being one of the few people I can talk to.
Thanks, Rodney. Of course I want to thank my friends
who are my friends everyday. All of my friends in SJ
BARLING PET and everywhere else. That means you.
67