Smut
Peddlers
It's Saturday night, and I'm weaving all
over Hawthorne Blvd in Lawndale, pissed off
over some stupid broad and her hundred-dollar-sun-
glasses mentality. I make a quick turn into an alleyway
to lose a cop a few cars behind me, only to find myself
in the parking lot of some dump called Frogs where a
band named the Smut Peddlers is playing. I reason with
myself that it's a better idea to fuck myself up on the
dance floor than in my car, so I stumble in through the
back door and straight
into one of those
punk/jock beat-down
mosh pits that are all too
common in the South.
Bay these days..
Nevertheless, on this
night, this is just what I
need, and I quickly com-
mence to thrashing
myself around in utter
and wild abandon. As far
as I can tell in my dizzy.
drunk-ass state, the Smut Peddlers consist of four dudes
taking up the duties of geetar playing and singin', plus
one little gal bangin' real hard on her drumset. I hear the
words "Fuck you... that's why" being spit out the
mouth of the singer, and it makes me feel real good. I
pick up my tempo, flailin' myself around on the dance
floor blindly. The punks are getting into it too-they're
getting rowdier. At the same time, the jocks are getting
scared. They've limited their activity to standing on the
fringes of the pit and giving
out pot-shot shoves to anyone
who gets close enough. I
think to myself, "Shit, there's
gonna be a fight" as the
Peddlers bust into a cover of
Suicidal Tendencies'
"Subliminal." This thought has
barely exerted my clouded
brain when I
see a construc-
tion-booted, tank-
toppin', no-fearin'
goon receive a
fist to the skull,
which in turn
ignites a full
dance floor jock
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vs punk battle San Francisco's only Date
royale. Being a BAD BOYS & GIRLS
lover, not a
fighter, I slith-
er my way towards the back
door, finding a Smut Peddlers
CD called Failure on the
way. Out the door and into
the parking lot I go, fired up
to get into somethin' else. Shit,
I wonder if any of these cars
got a CD player in 'em?
-Andy Harris
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