WAY
BrotY BY AND HAS PHOTOs ay Kami DavidSON
OUT
RE
I live out in the
alpine wilderness of
Colorado, and around the holiday sea-
son, it gets pretty nippy. I can't say !
like it here too much around that time,
so when this feller that I work with
over at the skiboard factory men-
tioned that him and some buddies
was a headin' out to Californ-i-yay for
some sort of holiday getaway, I knew
that somehow or other I would have
to weasel my scrawny ass along.
Well, it turns out these boys didn't
object much to me taggin' along with
'em just as long as I took one of them
four-wheeled boardskate contraptions
along with me. I didn't know why in
tarnation I needed one, and seein' as
how I didn't have one, I figured I was
shit outta luck. Luckily enough, a feller
at my work had it in his heart the pure
generosity to loan me one. Anyhow, a
few days before the birthday of Baby
Jesus, me and them other fellers
skinned out west right through a
nasty blizzard. As I drifted off a slum-
berin' in the back of the van we was
travelin' in, alls I could think about was
blonde-haired, bikini-boppin' surfin
gals and high-livin' movie stars I was
gonna be meetin'. I tell ya, I could
not wait
We blew through Vegas and right
away grabbed
a big ol' break-
fast of shiny, greasy
food at some fancy
schmancy hotel that
looked like a big cas-
tle. I won big on one a
them slot machine do-
dads and walked outta
they
was my
only way out
to
the
promised
land, I figured
I'd just have to wait till my
honeymoon before I got poolside in
Vegas. We found that there jump, and
all them boys as well as myself went a
flyin' off of it just like we was
birds. After a while we.
decided it was best that
we skin out further west to
the beyoutiful Pacific.
We barreled on intol
Los Angeles County right
at about 4:00 pm, just in
time to run into a traffic
jam that was movin'
about as fast as a slug
on snow. We was
wantin' to be stayin
near them beaches, so
that's where we headed.
Soon enough we found
ourselves in a place
called San Pedro and
found out there was yet
another one a them rollerboard
jumps in this town, so instead of goin'
to the
beach
like I was
fixin' to do
WE
there three smackers rich-
er. After that big ol' feast, I
was fixin' to just lay down
by some fancy pool and get
me a suntan. But no, them
fellers wanted to go find
some skatin' jump that was
behind a big pink casino. Well, seein
we went to
the 7th Street
school house
where that fly-out-
jump was at. This
jump was a real
Jong embankment
thing with a couple a
corners to it and one.
part that jutted out like?
some sort of cliff.
Besides them boys"
high-flyin' anties over that hip thing.
they was also jumpin' up on and even
over the eatin'
tables set out for the
children who went to
school there. Soon
enough we was all purdy
tired, so we headed on out
in search of a place to call
home for a spell. We was drivin'
down the main drag in San
Pedro when one a them boys
recollected that he had an old
buddy that was livin' on that
very street. We found his house
and was welcomed to stay there
by a girl who was livin' there as
well. Her name was The Buge,
and she said we wasn't half as
mangy and stinky as some of the
rock n' roll bands she had let
stay there before. Well, we was
happy as clams in the sand at
this point, and we celebrated
our arrival with some drinkin'
and other mischief.
Throughout the entire trip
out to where we was now at, I'd
been hearin' these boys yackety-
yakkin' about all these swimmin
pools we was gonna be fre
quentin' when we arrived. Now
this is somethin' that got me
excited, seein' as the only place
I'd soaked my hide in besides
the old washbasin was in the
Crick Well, the next
morning we set out
for some cement
pond called the
Nude Bowl out in the
middle of a big of desert. T
heard them boys say it was a
place that folks went to go skin
nydippin' just like fused to do in
the crick before they hauled me
off to the slammer for doin' it:
Well, Idama pear passed out in
sheer anticipation of seein
beautiful, naked ladies glidin
through the crystal clear
water of this so-called naked
pool, and when we finally got to
the dirt road that led to it, I got
outta the van and ran all the
way to it. When I reached the
top of the ridge where that pool
was at, my poor old heart sank
down to my toes. I didn't see no
naked people, not no people at
all. Even worse, the pool was
broke or somethin', because
there wasn't one drop a water in
it, and there was all kinds of
nasty-lookin' graffiti paint all
over. Just as I was about to turn
and tell 'em all about our bad
luck, them boys came a leapin
and a jumpin' up that ridge
with their boardskates and
jumped right in. Believe it or
not, them fools started usin' it as
another jump for them board-
skates and once again lured me
into doin' it myself. It turned out
to be just as fun as skinnydip-
pin'. Well, almost
Throughout the following
days, we went to many other
swimmin' pools, all of which
were broke just like that first
one. We went to one that was
shaped like a clover leaf and
rolled around it with some
older heavyset fellers named
Duane and Salba. We went to
another named Chicken's, which
was funny to me because I
didn't see no
chickens or
even a hen
house on the
premises.
Hell, down in San Diego
we even got to go flyin'
around on a broken pool
that was made outta
wood instead of cement.
Ain't no wonder why that
one was broke. We rode a
couple more a them u-
jumps as well, one of
which that was as tall
as two grizzlies
standin' on top of each other,
and just as frightenin
18 hawak
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