Shaun Palmer
STORY By BoB KLEIN
IT'S PRETTY FUNNY if you think about it.
Every Doc Marten-wearing, Arnet-buying,
goatee-sporting, tattoo-clad, No-Fearing.
skier-hating, shit-talking, "I pulled a blind
backside melon slide noodle doodle dandy
fancy schmancy slap happy fish dish me
thrill twill on the hill twirl swirl super burl ass
kickin' method mama gap sap crap with a
double toe loop slushripper wants you to
know about them and their trials and trib
ulations as a "hardcore" snowboarder. You
know, I have plenty of time to sympathize
with those poor "shredders" that can't
shred on every ski area, got kicked out of
a "lame ass disco party," met Shaun Palmer
and he was a dick, kinda snow happy, shred
head, hella cool, bro, brah, dudes.
Well, I've known Shaun Palmer for a pret-
ty long time (pretty good friends we are,
you might say). Pretty unlikely friendship if
you know both of us. We do share many
things in common, however.
The first time I met "Mini-Shred" was in
1983 or '84 at Mile High Skate ramp. I was
never a very good skater, but in those days,
nobody cared how well you skated, only
that you skated. Anyway, this kid would
always show up and rip. The funny thing
was he was always pissed off about some-
thing. He always acted like that last run was
PHOTOS BY BUD FAWCETT
super shitty or whatever. The first couple of
things I said to this kid didn't go over too
well with him, Pretty soon winter came, and
I saw that very same kid at Slide Mountain
almost everyday. Even on the best powder
day, that kid had something to say that
would piss somebody off. That's Shaun!
These days things are a little different.
I'm riding at Squaw and I hear some kids
talking in the lift line. "Dude, this place
sucks. Some dick ski patrol warned me if I
spray those lame skiers, that I'd have to
pick up all the trash I knocked over when I
pulled that huge ollie over the trash can, or
leave! What a dick." Another kid says, "If
Palmer were here, he would have punched
out that ski patrol, told him he can do what
he wants and that all skiers suck!"
The guy in the lift line behind the kid
says, "Excuse me, you are entitled to your
opinion, you know, but didn't Alex Cushing
build this place for skiing first? I also don't
really care what you say in public, but some
You don't see a lot of inverts on the slopes, so
Shaun (right) gets his at Windell's halfpipe.
Carvin' it up (for right) in St Moritz, Switzerland.
A young Mini-Shred (opposite left) hits the Soda
Springs halfpipe in 1985. Power frontside out
of the sun (below) at Saas Fee, Switzerland.
108 THRASHE
people are not too pleased to come to the peace and
serenity of the mountains just to listen to a bunch
of sniveling kids talk shit about skiing when, without
skiing, you'd have to walk up the hill!"
The sixteen-year-old know-it-all says, "Palmer
would kick his ass tool"
It's getting funnier by the second, isn't it? The
Shaun Palmer I know is a little different from the
Palmer the kids are describing. I've seen Shaun
walk out of a snowboard shop that has paid him to
make an appearance, saying, "I hate those things!" I
ask why, and he says, "Because when I walk in
and there's a bunch of salespeople starin' at
me, vibing, givin' me dirty looks, they
got their lame ass snowboard video
with snowboard cool band blaring.
and I think, 'What's up? These peo-
ple don't like me, they think that I'm
stupid. They're gonna swing from
my nuts. Where were they back in
'84? Why do they hate skiers?"
I ask Shaun why he does it if
he hates snowboarding that
much. He says that he loves
snowboarding, that's not the
problem. The problem is that
there's too many lookers and
not enough doers. Everyone