moon crater type deal called
Carrumbin, Salman lunched
on a carve and broke his
other wrist. Hospital The
cast they gave him was way
too big, so the "doctor"
starts sawing away at the
elbow (turned away when
the blood started to flow.
After the reconstruction, Sal
had huge gashes where the
cast was Straight up
Stephen King Much like
Santa Cruz, the Gold Coast
has its fair share of stoners,
freaks and losers. And guess
what? We met 'em all. After
they traded us some tabs,
Sob suggested that we go
back to Pizzey, gather some
wood and start a fire in the
big bowl and ride it while we
tripped out The night was
black while the bowl glowed
so hellishly in front of us.
Smoke billowed from deep
in the concreti as our pos
trils filled with charred euca
lyptus Welcome to hell.
What a beautiful sight to see
skaters pumping in and out
of the smoke hitting the top
and then disappearing back
into the swirling maelstrom.
After what seerned like.
hours, the cops showed up
and we ran for the hills.
After we got back to Seb's
apartment, that is where the
first shards of hatred reared
their ugly head: Andy-
Joey Julien-me and Coco
all exchanged death threats
while Agah tried to keep the
peace. The tension felt like
your tongue feels after dos
ing three tabs of clear.
could smell it and taste it
but could not get away from
it All the while Joey had his
shit-eating grin, oblivious to
the bloodthirsty wolfpack
that surrounded him. We cut
back to Brisbane for two
days before the long haul to
Sydney The first morning
back, we woke to find Cards
ducked out at dawn. One
down-nine to go.
Later that day, we were all
charging the hill that leads
to Paddington when Mister,
Downhill, Jouy, buys the
farm and fucks up his foot
OZZIE SLANG WORDS
84
5
EST
NO ADDITIVES
NO PRESERVATIVES
BREWED EXPRESS
COOPERS
FIVE DOLLARS
The Australian vocabulary.
in true stoner fashion, is
shortened to the point of
grunts and non-phrases
Here's a translation table
in case you ever run истов
skaters from Down Under
Filth Killer
Heaps Lots
Jumper Sweatshirt
Drop your guts Fart
Up the duff Pregnant
Servo-Gas Station
Oy Hey
Pist-Drunk
Root-Fuck
Arvo Afternoon
Cheers-Thanks
Bird Girl
Goey-Speed
Chop Weed
Tha-Thanks
Dodgy-Sketchy
BEER TALK
Coopers Killer
Victoria Bitter-Filler
XXXX Miller
Fosters Swiller
750ml
SPARK
EWERY LTD.
NG ALE
1962
bad. Out of commission for
sure. So now he is just taking
up space. The van is getting
lot hotter and more crowded
every time we pile in. Dubbed
the "van troll, Joe makes an
ass out of himself by dumping
product at ridiculously low
rates and undercutting all the a
established prices. I know he is
leaving one way or another.
SOCKED IN SYDNEY
Sydney is my kind of town,
big nightlife and action By
some stroke of luck, we
hooked up a house for all the
heads while the occupants
went to Brisbane to see The
Beastie Boys A pad is a pad.
We all had loot and things
were looking good. Our first
night in town, there were
some fisticuffs about a pool
game, but nothing but wide
eyes and swollen fists. In the
morning, we went out to see
the boys at Manly Skatepark
It's got a monster vert ramp
and a fenced in bowled area
that tips. The cartel hit warp
speed that day as Joey tried
to get enough bread to split
town. We were all glad he was
leaving, the van and floor
space were much needed
Piling into the van was a com
dy of errors. Someone would
hit a scab, and they'd kick)
someone else, who would!
slam the door on another!
fingers Nobody looked in
the others eyes, only out the
windows as the kilometers
wallowed by Joe is dust, just
packed up and split. No one
said a word, except Peter,
who asked if he left any weed.
One less-eight to go.
With the excess debris jetti
soned, there was a full before
the storm. Skating was fun.
and it seemed like
we might actually
make it, though
after ten days, they
were dropping like
flies Swollen bodies
Cregained conscious
ness the next morn
ing as we were off to
Canberra and the
park at Balconnen
Half-way into the
three hour drive, the
cellular phone rang
It was the girls who
let us stay at their
house, and they
were bugging. After
many threats and
dollar amounts to fix
the damage, they
told us we "better
not come back to
Sydney. The damage was so
minor I thought it was a joke
They wanted $2000 to make it
right. Sure. We had to go back
to Sydney, so I guess we were
dead meat. Maybe if (break
both my arms, they won't kill
me. If there ever was a place
to do it, it's the big pool at
Balconnen, which is easily top
five of all bowls in the world.
Smooth, concrete coping.
Clockwise from top left: Late
one afternoon as the sun was
setting on the horizon, some
one said. What about Five
Docks? Well we went there
and found a deeply kinked,
no flatbottom halfpipe.
The locals watched as every
one tried to find the lines
Julien Stranger found this
frantside hit from the drop-
and grabbed on for dear life.
The feet look sketchy but to
be perfectly honest, there is
no boiling here. This little
bike rack by the ferry landing
had just the right angle for
the Agoh man's frontside
slider attack. A pensive Andy
Roy watches the miles go by
as the hatred boils. Big Al
Petersen does the old tuck
knee flappa without any
pods whenever he wants.
channel, the works. Filth. We
stayed at this guy Mike D's
pad and he had all the spots
dialed: Snake runs, bowls,
pipes, ditches, all right there
for the taking The first night
there, Coco borrowed a bike
to go to the store and got
very lost. We sent a search
party out in the morning to
find the castaway. He came
back grumbling about sleep