SCRIBBLE THE BEATNUTS
THE NEW WAY
The time has come
when originality has final-
ly been abolished. Artists
have been replaced by
the last great use of the
creative mind, the Monet
11 2000. Now there is
only one recognized
artist, the Monet 2000.
Charles Machisse,
one of the few remaining
artists who managed to
hide underground, has been appre-
hended. He lies strapped to a table in
the lab of Dr Flat and the Monet . He
has been brought here to learn the
necessity of the machine. The doctor is
beginning his lesson.
"Charles, what makes you so spe-
cial? Why would anyone care if you
and a few other causeless rebels hide
away to paint your illegal paintings?"
Charles doesn't answer, he is clenching
his teeth and trying to break free. Dr
Flat insists, "Answer me or we'll make
you talk. We can do that too now."
Charles answers angrily, "People
need artists! Art tells the truth! Your
Monet 2000 cannot stop people from
creating. You'll never catch everyonel
Charles is out of breath and heaving
for air, but still he pulls at the bonds.
He only wishes to break free and to
strangle the doctor to death.
Dr Flat responds calmly, "Suppose
we do not reach everyone, we will, but
just suppose we don't. What good will
their work do anyone, hidden beneath
the ground?" The doctor smiles, "We
don't want to destroy everyone's art.
You saw the Mona Lisa, the Thinker
and the Venus on the way in..."
Charles breaks in, "All stamped with
the National Corporation of Art, not
the real artists' signatures, you bas-
tards!" Charles is dangerously out of
breath, he is terribly asthmatic and
getting dangerously over-worked.
"Charles, try to calm yourself, Artis
an imitation of life, and everyone is
part of life, so everyone is art. Why
should one person get all the credit?
The National Corporation of Art creat-
ed the machine behind you in order to
represent all people as artists. The
Monet II 2000 is not so bad, it is nec-
essary to help with the efforts of final
ly achieving equality amongst men."
Word of the World Equality Move-
ment sends rage through Charles
body. The movement was nothing
more than fascism and its leader mere
ly another Hitler. If history hadn't been
changed so every leader was no better
or worse than the other, anyone could
see there'd been six attempts to make
some sick world with everyone equal
except for the one supreme and more
equal leader since World War II.
28
"Listen Dr Flat, I know about your
pitiful movement. You call it equality.
for everyone, but it is really control
you seek. There are people out there
who will see through this selfish plot
for power. History proves this again
and again. Not your lousy reprints of
history, but the history that people tell
their children, so jerk-offs like you get
your fat fried, bacon ass!"
The doctor interrupts, "It is not my
movement, I merely run the machine, I
am no better or worse that an employ
ee who produces music, food or cars.
The movement is everyone's move-
ment. Everyone, except for you."
Charles' face is cherry red, "You'll
never get my creations! They're hid-
den in the depths of hell from you!"
The doctor grins, or maybe sneers a
little. He walks over to a cabinet and
pulls out a canvas. He smiles and nods
his head, "I love the way the grass and
the sky pull together, you've truly cap-
tured some essence of life here. This
will make an excellent contribution."
The doctor turns the picture around.
Charles jumps hard enough to jolt the
table. He's now paralyzed with shock.
"Oh Charlie, don't be modest. We
are very choosy about what we put our
labels on. You should be flattered."
The doctor lays the painting on a
table with a glass top. "Think of what
you are contributing to Charlie. It is
world peace, you know? Work for me
and you can paint without all that
damned competition. Make posters
and flyers with us to spread the word
of the new way. Won't you please con
sider?" Dr Flat pleads.
Charlie doesn't answer. He is in a
much better world than the terrible
room he was just in. Much better. He
thinks of the day he painted the cow
on the canvas. The sky was a spectac-
ular blue and it seemed to blend right
into the grass, just like the doctor...
"Charlie." No answer. "Charlie? It's
done Chuck, old boy. Your art has
earned the stamp, but now it is every
one's art. Think though, you are also
the proud painter of the Mona Lisa
too. Did you expect that?" asks Dr
Flat. He laughs to himself, "This is a
hell of a little artist we have invented."
-Anthony Montagna
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