STRANGER 43
assholes up on stage who just fuckin'
drink and know how to play and they
all get together and create some-
thing bigger than four people. Then,
you get on your skateboard and
you're not just some idiot, you're try-
ing to be better than what you are.
Like Robert DeNiro. He's the sickest
actor. He's not just DeNiro, he's this
fuckin insane imitator of insane-
ness or something. I don't know,
man, it's fuckin' terrible. Everything
is fucked up. I hate to say anything
because you end up lying. Every-
thing sucks Let's go to the party.
(Our heroes get denied) Fuck you.
you sorry ass. Got denied, dude.
Everywhere we go. Why does
that always happen to us? They're
waiting for the magic word and i
don't know it. Oh, it's "please." Oh,
my God, I forgot the magic word,
you asshole. You did say, "Please,
can we come in?" And he said "No,
it's a closed party." That guy was a
fuckin' asshole. Let's go see what
Xavier's doing. I'm gonna kill that
asshole, men. I'm seriously gonna go
beat that guy up. What up, Xavier?
There's a party down the street.
Hey Xavier, you got some rocks? I'm
about to fuck some shit up. Some
retard was at the door and I told
him I was gonna kick his ass and he
tells his friends that I'm threatening
his life. What the fuck? I'm all,
"Dude, leave your fuckin' knife and
your gun and come out here right
now and I'm gonna fuck you up." Fm
not afraid of him. Yo, you might have
to toss me a baseball bat in a second
because this guy is charging down
the block right now. I'm serious.
dude. There's five dudes. I'm gonna
get fucked up if you don't toss me
that bat. Xavier: I don't want my win-
dow to get fucked up, I'll pay for
your fuckin' window. You'd rather
see me get fucked up than have me
pay for your window? You know why
they're trippin'? Because we
knocked over their motorcycles.
knocked over their fuckin bikes.
Why you doggin me, Xavier? Let us
in, man, or toss me a fuckin' bat.
Dude: You're in big trouble mother
fucker. Come on out you little fuckin'
piece of shit. I want the guy that
knocked over my fuckin' Harley
Come out now cocksuckers. It
wasn't us, man. Dude: Your friends
then. What friends, dude? Dude:
You, with friends, man. You all fuckin'
skate, right? So what? Dude #2:
Come on, cocksucker. Take two.
Their fuckin' small. Why are you
fuckin' with us? Dude: because!
feel like it. Somebody knocked over
a $10,000 bike over there that hap-
pens to be mine. Why do you think
it was us? Dude, because you're a
fuckin' skater, Holmes, and a fuckin
bunch of them just couldn't get into
64 THRASHER
that party. Just two of us couldn't
get in. And you think we'd knock
over your bike just because we
couldn't get into a party? Dude #2
So, did you knock it over? No, we
didn't. Dude #2. Was it knocked
over when you came up to the door?
don't even know. I didn't even see
I
no fuckin' bike out front. Dude:
Bullshit, you cowardly little shits
I'm just going to my friend's house,
man. (Later on that night:) Now,
we're looking at people like Dr.
Rick and Jake who are older, you
know? At least we get to look for-
ward to those years and still skate.
Jake's still in the forefront, I think.
Do you know what an exception
Jake is, man? There's only one Jake.
Tony Alva still skates. There's a lot
of people, I guess, but not too
many that I know. All of our friends
are rad. Skating is self-expressive.
It's not competitive. It is competi-
tive, though. It is, but if you skate
and you're self-expressive, then
you're not even doing what other
people are doing You're not fight
ing to learn the newest tricks out. I
mean, Sheffey is the sick power
guy, backs de 180° the fattest islands
before anyone. And Rodney, he's
doing his own thing. He's not trying
to stay ahead, he's just doing his own
thing. And you and me, we're just
trying to skate everything and be
kind of good at everything. At least
to know how to do something.
We're getting our rush, man. Fully
We're not getting it from going, "Oh
my God, no one's ever done that.
Push your own limits. That's what
it's all about. I still want to do what
I want rather than worry about what
someone else is doing even though
there's so much sick shit going down.
It gives you so many good ideas.
Skating is fun. I hate everything that
comes out of my mouth. I just want
to skate. I know, everything we've
been talking about for however
long is just bullshit.
MORGAN
from page 47
den down a hill? Yeah, back in the
day, we used to go down hills all over
the place. You'd shoot any hill?
Probably. When are you going to
come up to San Francisco? I don't
know, I've been up there once. What
was you favorite thing about San
Francisco? Watching those fools
jump down the Wallenberg stairs.
Have you ever gotten busted
going across the border with noth
ing? They pretty much hassle me
every time I go across. They just
think of any reason to fuck with you.
Usually they make me go through
immigration which is stupid 'cause
I've never have done anything
wrong. Never? No. Last time I went
across, I was close to Ohio, and I
didn't have enough money on me so
I had to go to a bank machine sol
could show them I had money Have
you ever been arrested? Once in
Pennsylvania, I got into a fight with
someone's dad. My friend Sean
Miller was fighting this guy's son and
then his huge dad walked up and
popped me in the face then called
the police. So you had to work hist
dad? We kind of did. He jumped me
and then my friends were kicking
him when he was on the ground. Did
you tune on his face? He was too
big. This was two years ago, I was a
lot smaller. Do you think he still
remembers it? I'm sure he does.
Does his kid still skate? His kid
never skated, he was a skinhead.
Do you always sleep late or do you
skate all night? Usually I sleep until
about noon. Do you ever snow-
that fat Thunder ad. That's true.
What's gonna happen in the next
five years in skateboarding? There
will probably be nobody skating at
all because the tricks will get so tech-
nical that nobody will be able to do
them. And the kids won't think it'll be
fun because if you're just starting,
there's no way you'll be able to
learn any new tricks, and so nobody
will skate at all and it'll just be over.
Does Tony Hawk rule in hell?
Yeah, he's pretty rad, definitely.
What about Christian? Christian's
amazing My main man. Do you
like contests? I don't think I'll ever
enter one again. Alien guys don't.
care? No, not really. They don't
care at all.
board? No. Too many white peo- DITCH from page 37
ple. Most of the snowboarders are
gay. Are there any hot guys in
Canada that we should know
about? Not where I'm from, but I
guess in Vancouver there's a lot of
rad people. Tony Ferguson's really
rad. When's your birthday?
February 7, 1973. What kind of
tunes do you listen to when you
skate? NWA, The Pharcyde. Not
Lynyrd Skynyrd? I listen to Lynyrd
Skynyrd, Iron Maiden, AC/DC, what-
ever it takes. Do you have a girl.
friend? No, girls aren't into me very
much. Do you think that nothing
really matters except skating?
Yeah. Well, I'm going to get my car
to go faster. That matters to me. And
you're gonna drive off a cliff? No,
I'll just race other people. What
other sports do you participate in
besides skateboarding? I don't
know anything but skateboarding
You don't know how to fix cars?
can fix a car enough to drive a beat-
er across the country. What space in
your heart does the Gonz hold for
you? He pretty much did it all. The
guy is gnarly. That railing in the Blind
video is pretty damn gnarly. I saw
your runs at Houston. You were
getting ugly on that frontside air
to rail. I don't know what I was doing
on that metal monster. You tried the
180 heelflip over the box and
then what did you get, Tom? A
dislocated knee. That was rough.
You were just lying there. Hyper-
extended knee, actually. I like it that
you don't have to wear pads..
That's one of the funnest skateparks
I've ever been to. What's the high
est air you ever did on a ramp? |
did a seven foot air to fakie once.
What grab? Just traditional back-
sido. Have you ever hung up on a
big backside air? No, I hung up on
a Madonna really bad once. And
what did you get? It made me
want to puke and my whole body
was numb. It was the worst slam
ever. Do you ever do handrails?
Not too much. I used to do them a
lot. You did that 180° nosegrind in
the 1.2 mile desert hill. He was
gone as soon as the race had start
ed and was cold chillin' at the finish
line long before the rest of the pack
ambled into the station.
The layers went at it and sank
away at speed. The peck was tight
and shifting as each rider jockeyed
for position on the two-lane track.
Tom Howzer probably would have
placed but he lost it on the second.
curve, shooting into the desert for a
gnarly spill through gravel and cac-
tus. When the racers poured past the
finish line, Bob Garza had edged out
George Azepatia and Danny Castro
in the flat-out desert speed run.
That night, everyone settled.
down to a feast of enchiladas and
chile rellenos. Afterwards, there
was a gig featuring the expression-
istic punk pallete of Los Clavos, the
guitar grind/DJ-flavored sounds of
Milky Fly, and the all out hell over-
ture of Dreadnought. The next
morning called for a session with the
El Paso posse at Coronado High,
where slick ledges, hallways and
killer handrails are all the rage. But
when a light rain began to fall, it was
time to move on. Dryer skies to the
northeast called for a pool raid in the
square bowlage of the Ramada Inn,
where fully fine transitions and
carve lines through the shallow and
deep comers were had by all.
Gradually, the wind picked up.
carrying sand, sticks and winged
creatures. The painted ceiling
faded to a deeper blue, passing to
a threatening grey, Bolts of lightning
splintered down from the heavens in
brutal rapid-fire succession. Thunder
boomed in accompaniment, explod
ing in the regions of the fattest,
lowest bass. For a few minutes, there
was no rain, only the impending.
scent of water travelling by with the
wind. Then the flood gates opened
wide as a rolling rift of water and
mud came barreling down the gully
in every mother's nightmare, the
dreaded flash flood. Thank heavens
the desert has ditches.
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