petrified rock
by Rex
W
hen you want serious dosage of the kill tunes.
few bands fit the bill better than Led Zeppelin,
Aerosmith, Van Halen and AC/DC. Inspiring
flight at at sessions far and wide, fossil fuel from.
the fantastic four cranks forth at volumes beyond eleven. Put
Jimmy Page, Steven Tyler, David Lee and Angus up against
any of today's pansy rockers from Prince to Morrissey, and
who's going to kick ass? That's right. Honorable mentions go
out to The Who, Rush, Blue Oyster Cult, Queen, Black Sabbath
and Deep Purple. Call them what you will but these ball-busting
behemoths of yesteryear still rock the planet.
After the three millionth Led Zep block party weekend, Jimmy
Page, Robert Plant, John "Bonzo" Bonham and John Paul
Jones are still the undisputed heavyweight champions of rock
and roll. Zeppelin is a common heritage shared by humanoids
from all rocks of life, a universal language amongst Ledheads
and schralping skaters everywhere. Mystical interludes of
blues, power and dynamics brew a magic that no band before
or since can ever hold a candle to. The essential Zep includes
Led Zeppelin I, II, Presence and Physical Graffiti, but this is
only a slice of the prodigious pie. For a full accounting, check
the four CD Led Zeppelin boxed set, digitally remixed by Page.
the master himself.
avid Lee Roth's
departure from
Van Halen tore a
void in the fabric
of rock, and it is doubtful
anything will ever be the
same. With Roth at the
helm, Van Halen explored
the upper limits of the
rock and roll life-style..
parading it about and
throwing in bits of degen-
erate class. Eddie's explo-
sive riff bomb "Eruption" is
a savage feat of rock and
roll brilliance and the per-
from AC/DC to ZEPPELIN
fect wake-up music for the deceased. Van Halen I and II were
standards in skateparks from Lakewood, California, to Jack-
sonville, Florida, during their time. The cathedral chorus of
"Ain't Talkin' Bout Love" still echoes at skater gathering places
throughout the world. On "And The Cradle Will Rock," off
Women And Children First, super screecher Roth manages to t
sound like the arch-typical disgruntled parent as he asks that
timeless question, "Have you seen junior's grades?" Eddie
responds on cue with a horrific moan of distortion that explodes
into a outburst of full raging chunka-chunka glory.
omewhere along the road, Aerosmith took off into the
rock and roll stratosphere. Steven Tyler's provocative
lyrics and saucy delivery melded with Joe Perry's cut-
leads to drive Aerosmith's high-powered I
I hootenan-
ny of sound beyond the clouds. Their early material was a bar-
rage of blues-born blasts and bawdy chops that have made
them one of the great all-American rock bands. Pandora's Box
is a three-CD boxed set that documents early cuts from Aero-
smith's electric calliope of power ballads, raunchy rockers and
serious grooves-o-rama. Twenty years after their self-titled first
album, the Boston boilers still produce heavy rockers like.
Pump, Permanent Vacation and Done With Mirrors, while their
contemporaries have long ago faded to grey.
If you want blood, you've got it. AC/DC, Australia's guardians
of power, deal down and dirty deeds like no other. The genius
of AC/DC is their simplicity-primal chord progressions ham-
mered down with gusto and lyrics that constitute every mother's night-
mare. Rhythm meister Malcolm Young paves the way for brother
Angus lead overdoses, while the band's power-house rhythm section
pummels the sledgehammer through steel on albums like Highway to
Hell and Let There Be Rock. It's true that no one can ever replace
Bon Scott's skill as a high-pitched screamer, but Brian Johnson's
vocals on Back In Black were hot enough to scorch the sun.
The father of modern heavy metal guitar, Edward Van Halen (far left) revels in a lead break.
A Tasmanian devil in schoolboy's clothing, AC/DC guitarist Angus Young (left) let
lets it ring.
Jimmy Page and Robert Plant (below left) broke hearts as well as box office records. Aero-
smith's Toxic Twins, Tyler and Perry (below) survived every excess of the rock and roll
fantasy, and they are still bad to the bone.