costume. But at least Bart's
maiti-million dollar con
tracts with 20th Century Fox
and Mattel assured that he
was set for life. Longtime
skate contortionist Gumby,
sponsored by Tesco, was
considered a relie by most
with his old style laybacks
and happed inverts.
Cookie oilled into a long
backside five-o grind on a
perfectly worn red curb
and then locked into a fast
Smith grind over a sewer
grate. He had heard clown
Acrobat (made in China)
was in town Clown was an
early battery-powered di
hoseur, into freestyle and
handstands, with hands
molded to clamp onto the
rails of his board. Clown's
dain to fame was his bat
tery board which spun
180's whenever he hit a
wall. Still, nobody gave
Clowny much trouble ex-
cept for big Bart, because
both were eight inches tall
and cost big bucks. Most of
the other toy crew are in
the four to five range; in
both dollars and inches
The word was out that
the 1991 crop were ready
to rock skate toy standards
The small Hasbro G. Joes
were mounted on hover-
boards this year, probably
better for kicking butt in
bedroom versions of Desert
Storm All the molds were
also talking about the Slim
mers gang from Mattel,
Slammers were stunt-skat
ing jump rampers with pony
tails and wired skeleton-like bodies.
Riding huge boards weighed down
with four ball bearings, they whipped
across the floor standing upright Diag
Dang, Ollie Grab, Lip Slide and Gnash
were in town with the Ramp Grinder
Stunt Set jump ramps and the crazy,
spatula-like launchers.
Everybody thought the Mutant Ninja
Turdes would get their own models
from Playmate Toys, but their arsh
enemy Mondo Gecko scored the big
contract. Mounted on dual exhaust
rocketpowered board, the Geclaman
was blessed with fully rotating limo
head and tak Ninja Sewer Surfer tried
to trade boards with hin
bubung up and slammed
on a blunt slide.
Cookie finally reached
Hurricane and Impossible,
where raging session was
in progress Skate toys
were everywhere. Mack the
Knife from McDonalds
Rude Dog and his twin
brother Dude skating for
Sun Sportswear, Felix the
Caviding for his own com
pany, several Bart clones,
Wire Art Sculpture (un-
sponsored), Police Acade
my Kook from Warner Bros.
with dropping pants fea-
ture, and Skate Chimp from
Tware were all ripping o
and nome variations. Plenty
of fingerboards were lying
around and someone had
brought along their skate
board pencil sharpeners
from the seventies Godzilla
showed, but he didn't have
his board Skate Ninja (ARC)
Toys) and Battery Boarder
(Radio Shack) took one
ock at the street area and
split, probably to avoid any
embarassment
It was a hectic session,
with every toy pushing the
limits, trying to make stock-
ing stuffer status for some
snotty-nosed, greedy
crybaby who always ex-
pects more than he gets at
Christmastime
After watching Felix olite
to-indy grab over the fire
hydrant and Mondo Gecko
wallride to the roof an a
board borrowed from the
Slammers Cookie Monster
grdooed Snoopy and Bart and headed
off to a killer side-by-side double-
bowled deep Sink They sessioned all
aight and were still at le the next mom-
Ing when Toys 'R' Us opened up for the
day after Thanksgiving shopping boom
Peace on Earth, Mary Christmas, and
hoppy sales to all.
HEADCHEESE
strange, whining Morrocan
music. At the fountain, the
TBC spraycan posse was
putting the finishing flour-
ishes on the ramps. Bum-
mer, Jerrmeister and Lar-
romony would have to
wait awhile, if not for the
paint to dry, at least for
the coast to clear.
In the meantime, they
wandered toward a row
of game booths where
wrinkled, tattooed
carnies beckoned to
passing pigeons. "It's
ten bucks to watch
and only two to
play. Come over
here and save
yourself eight
bucks." Jerronius
and Larrittude
stayed only long
enough to
torment the
barkers and
laugh at their
schpiels.
Ai Petersen (p. 50) looked ie the
one to beat in qualifying, but he ran
out of gas in the final lap. Always
hungry for me win, Eric D. (ight)
serves up a healthy stale-to-ral on
his way to it place.
BAD
AB