RUMORS
TRASH
Bob Denike, ex-Frito engineer, current
downhill ace and Santa Cruz promo man is
rumored to be getting married.
before spending the summer in the snow
of South America training.
Rodney Mullen is rumored (by certain
Hell Tour types) to be close to the wedding
Hell Tour 2 is rumored to be in full-tilt chapel.
swing. Mr. Louis B.
Dorfman is rumored to
have denied any in-
volvement or respon-
sibility for the debacle.
Furthermore, Mr. D. is
rumored to be on a
busman's holiday to
Korea, where he is ob-
taining Olympic Games
tickets. Hell-raiser John
Lucero is rumored to
have broken his nose
after walking through a
plate glass door. Jinx is
rumored to be riding
another man's model in
an elaborate counter-
marketing play. Two
shops the tour has
visited have reportedly
gone bankrupt and tour
members allegedly
swindled a young girl
out of her mechanical
cow. The tour is also
rumored to be operating
off a famous skate in-
dustrialist's credit card.
The tour van was
rumored to have been
robbed in New Orleans,
of everything but the
COW.
Dallas
and
Houston are rumored
never to be the same
again. Some fashion
model was reportedly
"all tied up" over the
tour. Perhaps she was
excited? Rocco was
rumored to have driven
fourteen hours straight
while the rest of the tour flew direct.
ing agents to Europe this season to track
down the sources of alleged product
counterfeiting.
In the most talked-about move since Mr..
Ronaldo Bennett, G&S is rumored to be
swatch
BRECKENRIDGE
GENUIN COLORADO
going into the truck
manufacturing busi-
ness. Further rumors
state that these alleged
steel trucks are different
from the rest.
Other rumors revolve
around Australiod Terry
Fitzgerald's chrome.
moly truck protos.
The Beastie Boys
purportedly voted "no"
on their first corporate
generated proposed
model graphic.
The union strike at
another premier truck)
manufacturing complexi
is rumored to be history.
Following Atlanta's
faceplant, Rob Mertz is
rumored to be consider-
ing false teeth.
Grigley and Joe
Johnson are rumored
to be joining Hell Tour 2.
B.K. is rumored to be
on Schmitt Stix and off
of ?.
The czar of Voodoo
Economics, the vener-
able Art Harris, is
rumored to be calling for
the fall in 1991. Mr. Har-
ris, who has been
known to speculate in
stocks from time to time
as well as to allegedly
advise several top riders
financially, is rumored to
have identified '91 as
the end of an obscure
500-year cycle, or
something equally noteworthy. Apparently,
in 1991 when all the cycles bottom
out...Mr. Harris is rumored to charge 150
bucks per hour for his advice, so expect a
bill in the mail if you read this.
If it was a voodoo hex, it worked. Skate snow pro Bert Lamar with locks of hair snipped from
passed-out partiers the night before the World Championships at Breckenridge.
Neil Blender is rumored to now only
skate small ramps. Lance Mountain is
rumored to have rebuilt his ramp (again),
this time with fish net siding.
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Jeff Phillips' "performance" at certain
Australian demos is rumored to have ticked
off a few pros.
The infamous "Other Skate Rag" is
rumored to be picking the editor for their
semi-secret snowboard rag.
Burt Lamar, born-again skater turned
snowboarder, is rumored to have shot a
Wrigley's Gum TV. commercial in Canada.
Rob Roskopp and Da Gonz are rumored
to have split the fee of a prominent out-call
Australian female sports trainer.
Marty Jimminez's baby is reportedly
named Mr. Fuzzy (in an alleged tribute to
Everett Rosecrans?).
Rumored to be turning into a news
agency photographer is Bryce Kanights.
Mr. Mo is rumored to be out of the Black
Forest military antiques biz and heavily into
Ice Age fossils. Recent rumors involve mail
orders of pre-historic shark fossils and cave
bear skulls.
Several manus are rumored to be send-
Douglas Biggert, of Tower fame, the man
who is said to have introduced Rat Nuts and
Kryptonics to Russia, is further alleged to
be holding the only known copies of Deluxe
Publishing's primal treatise "12 Months of
Hell." This king hell monograph by Morizen
Foche is said to be available to any deser-
ving parties. Alleged contact may take place
with Doug at the Sacto slide 'n roll.
And our sponsored-rider, promo-
poundage sweepstakes continues. Just
what top shredmaster dudes pull down the
most in promo freebies? Following the
alleged 2,000 buck plus forages of one
Christian Hosol in Jimmy'Z land, who even
comes close? If rumors are to be believed,
the one and only Spidey, the Black
Bowman, comes close. Mr. Spide is
rumored to take truckloads out of
Quicksilver, all "for use by his many friends."
For even grander aspirations consider
McGill's much-rumored acquisitive ac-
tivities at Skate Rags. But then he is
rumored to own part of the company.
Dressen and Salba were rumored to be
frequent co-sessioneers at some ultra-
esoteric, 24-foot AZ pipes. The grade is
reportedly three stories down. However, just
before press we learned they had been seal-
ed off and we haven't heard from Steve or
Eric since.
Natas Kaupas is rumored to be taking the
star-struck hopefuls on tours of Freddy
Siegel's emporium in S.M., where he has
a notorious pro cooking hamburgers. The
pro is rumored to be none other than
Dressen.
Rumored to have faced off in a pain con-
test: Danforth and Martinez. Exhibit A: Bill
burns arm with cigarette lighter. Exhibit B:
Jesse responds by scratching "I HATE
THIS LIFE" into his arm, full-length. Exhibit
C: Next day Danforth rips off scab and
pours salt into his own wound. Exhibit D:
Tune in next month.
QUESTION OF MONTH
Which manu is rumored to have made a
small error on his taxes, resulting in a
$160,000 quarterly tax bill?
BUST OF MONTH
While Rocco slept, theives allegedly
broke into his pad and stole all his skate.
stuff. Persistent reports state that even his
tennis shoes were pulled off his sleeping
feet.
QUOTE OF MONTH
"I'm a walking nightmare."
John Lucero
LOOKING AT ANIMAL CHIN
For reasons unrevealed (perhaps
secrecy?), the long-awaited Bones video 3,
many of the sport's finest were in attend-
ance and, of course, they were in rare form.
Name virtually anybody of repute and
someone who attended will invariably come
up with an epic tale of premieredom. (In fact
the Santa Monica debacle had such fallout
that the local cops spent several days
attempting to curb the outbreak of skate
activity.) Even Stevie C. was observed get-
ting the rouse after a particularly spirited
ollie. Everyready Eddie and Dave Hackett
crawled off with the body adornment prizes,
in their Eveready Battery Hat and Do You
Swallow? lapel button, respectively. Never
to be outdone, Spidey came in Greco-
Gaucho attire while the Gonz chose to reap-
pear on the American mainland wearing
basic white. Elsewhere, Meek and McGill
I wore casts and slings while Roberta and
Muir confounded all with Brett Saber-
hagen's World Series game ball. Powell
wore a gang prairie duster, Rocco wore a
guilt-glazed expression, O wore a greasy
hat, Mo wore a headband, G.S.D. wore a
plastic eye tube, Johnny Ray wore a
sharkskin suit, Frank Hawk wore a grin,
Novak wore a tan, Natas wore somebody
else's clothes, Peralta wore a director's hat,
Ganzer wore what else but Billy Al
Bengston's cheese dip, Ry Cooder wore
a musical ensemble and The Dragon.
Woman wore a wetsuit. Many wore hang-
overs the next day, (excepting, of course,
the superbly-conditioned skate ath-a-letes
who unilaterally passed on the compli-
mentary drink tickets?). Powell/Peralta are
to be congratulated for the party and for
helping out charity via the San Jose benefit.
Mr. Mike George, bro of Matt and Sam, also
deserves organizational credit. As for the
video, now we can all watch it on cassette
several hundred times and figure out what
it means.
PREMIERE REACTIONS
"Untouched, unmatched."
Ray Bones Rodriguez
"Killer camera work."
Cooksie
"Dude, obstreperous."
Laura & Grant
George the bartender
"Nothin' but a good time."
The Search for Animal Chin, was premiered "It was beautiful."
virtually simultaneously in three separate
locations. As a result a couple of thousand
eager skate addicts witnessed this video
saga amidst highly festive conditions. For
the record, the premiere sites were the
Mayfair Music Hall in Santa Monica, the Mis- "Totally rad."
sion Theatre in Santa Barbara, and Foothill
College in Los Altos. As might be expected,
Al Losi
Mrs. Hawk
(Continued on next page)
ON BOARD
COMING EVENTS
C.A.S.L. Series
California Amateur Skateboard League
August 15 Del Mar, CA Del Mar Skate
Ranch. Pool and banked slalom.
September 6 Visalia, CA Visalia YMCA.
Labor Day ramp contest.
"Double Point Contest
For further information call the NSA Hotline
(714) 882-3406 or write C.A.S.L. PO. Box
3004, San Bernardino, CA 92413.
N.S.A Amateur Vertical Series
August 22 Houston, TX S. Central Dist.
All amateurs must enter the district con-
tests where he/she resides. Entry for each
district limited to 40 competitors. Register
through NSA office. For more info write to
NSA, PO. Box 3645, San Bernardino, CA
92404.
1987 NSA Pro Tour
September 12-13 Oceanside, CA
Pro/Am street and freestyle. Sponsored
ams only.
For more info write to NSA, PO. Box
3645, San Bernardino, CA 92404. NSA
Hotline: (714) 882-3406.
17th Street Surf Shop Series
August 29-30 Mt. Trashmore, VA Ramp
1A-2A-Spon.
For more information contact 17th St.
Surf Shop, 532 Virginia Beach Blvd., VA
Beach, VA 23451 (804) 422-2441.
European Skateboard Championships
August 22-23 Taby, Sweden High jump,
Freestyle, Halfpipe, Giant slalom,
Special slalom and Parallel slalom. For
info contact: Jan Söderhäll, Gästrikegatan
9, 1 trög, S-113 Stockholm, Sweden.
Excell Skates Half-Pipe Invitational
August 15-16 Reno, NV Factory spon-
sored ams., Nevada State Fair. For info
call Charlie Morello (702) 322-6001.
YMCA Summer Skate Camp
August 2-7 Visalia, CA
August 9-14 Visalia, CA
August 16-21 Visalia, CA
August 23-28 Visalia, CA
For information contact Bobby Goodsby at
(209) 627-0700 or write Visalia YMCA, 211
West Tulare Ave., Visalia, CA 93277.
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