Skarfing
Material
with Chef-Boy-Am-I-Hungry
RAT BONES
WHEELS THAT REWORK
REALITY
INTO THE BLACK
Surging waves rocket toward the land,
pounding with endless crushing blows.
against the moonlit, windswept beach.
Receding, then returning to pound again,
in and out and in and out, the sea makes
its eternal love to the land.
Born by this endless passion comes the
stowaway, delivered to the shore from the
nothingness of Mother Ocean. An outcast
purged from some passing vessel into the
cold black that is the bosom of the unforgiv-
ing coast. Stumbling through the foam, as
innocent a man as sure as any man is ever
innocent, the once hopeless figure finds
hope, only to realize the mystery of what
may lay before him. Confusion swims
through the outcast's water-logged mind.
He slumps wearily to the prehistoric soil and
calmly creeps into a deep, much-needed
sleep.
Dreams can be hazardous, dreams can
be helpful and dreams can be real. At center
stage in his dream stand the demons of his
misfortune. The sinister captain, the guns,
the evil laughs, the plunge. Engulfed, panic
stricken and helpless, he questions his
survival.
Like a black and white TV. with a bad pic-
ture tube, the dream changes channels.
The new program, based upon the present
situation: hunger. Alone, washed upon a far
away beach and hungry. Hunger, fueling his
dream, stoking it like a furnace of brightly
burning logs from the forest of time. It's a
far cry from visions of sugar plums danc-
ing in his head. This dream is a monster,
a nightmare, a screenplay for some of
the
WORST RECIPES OF ALL TIME.
CAUTION: THE FOLLOWING ARE TO BE
PREPARED AT YOUR OWN RISK. SKARFING
MATERIAL, CHEF-BOY-AM-I-HUNGRY, THE
PUBLISHERS OF THIS PUBLICATION, GARY
HART, JIM BAKKER, REAGAN AND ANDY
WARHOL RELINQUISH ANY AND ALL
RESPONSIBILITY FOR SITUATIONS
RESULTING FROM THESE EXOTIC DISHES.
BIRD CRAP NESTS
3 tbsp. margarine
2 tbsp. creamy peanut butter
3 cups miniature marshmallows
1 can (5 oz.) chow mein noodles
1 bag of chocolate chips
Melt margarine and peanut butter
together in a 3 quart saucepan over low
heat. Add marshmallows and stir whenever,
until marshmallows are melted and smooth.
Add chow mein noodles and mix until
throroughly coated with the crap that's in
the pan. Next, drop noodle mixture by
rounded tablespoonfuls onto a greased
cookie sheet; shape with a greased finger
into a nest. Press some chocolate chips
(bird doo-doo) firmly into the nests. Let the
nests sit until they are dry. Eat. (Submitted
by Chris Funk of Valparaiso, IN.)
POSEUR TOE JAM SANDWICH
•2 slices moldy wheat bread
3 heaping spoonfuls of peanut butter
5 pieces of toe jam
Spread peanut butter on bread. Pick toes
until you get some toe jam. Put it on very
carefully. Put bread together and give it to
the poseur next door. Watch results. (Sub-
mitted by David Woods of Lexington, KY.).
DRUNK DUDES' DRINK
•1
1 egg
cup of milk
1 packet hot cocoa mix
2 heaping knifefuls strawberry preserves
½ teaspoon anisette liqueur
⚫a little Hershey's chocolate syrup
Put ingredients in the blender and press
the "mix" button. Makes enough. Note: if
you're a recovering alcoholic or straight.
edge, skip the anisette. (Submitted by ZOO
of Minneapolis, Mn.)
KEEP EVERYONE AND
EVERYTHING AWAY RECIPE
.1 onion bagel
.1 onion
garlic salt
⚫ Cajun spice
Cut the onion bagel in half. Put two large.
slices of onion on one half and sprinkle with
garlic salt and Cajun spice. Top with other
bagel half and skarf. (Submitted by Chris
Streight of Portland, OR.)
IT'S A SELL OUT
The tide is rapidly coming in, and soon
there will no longer be an opportunity to pur-
chase the ultra-chic Skarfing Material Shark
Taco T-shirt. So, in order to get the hottest
thing since Flashdance, just send $10.25
(postage and handling included) to
Thrasher Magazine, PO. Box 884570, San
Francisco, CA 94188-4570...and don't hold
your breath.
POWELL PERALTA
FORMULA V-4
TOMMY G.
ON
ERRERO XT
NEW 30" GU.