ON BOARD RASH
COMING EVENTS
October 5th
A DAY OF HELL
Hunter's Point Dish Am Jam
San Francisco, CA
Contest starts at 10:00 a.m. $5.00 entry
fee. Prizes to 10th place. Be there.
October 23-26
THRASH-A-THON 85: SKATE FOR
HEART
Frat Ramp. San Luis Obispo, CA
72 hours of skate chaos to benefit The
American Heart Associaton. For more info:
Eric Horn, (805) 544-9913. All sponsors
welcome.
1985 CASL SCHEDULE
October 19
Del Mar Skate Ranch... Banked Streetstyle
Banked Slalom
November 2
Pipeland, Upland Combi-Pool/Tight Slalom
October 28th
17TH STREET TRASHMORE JAM II
Mount Trashmore Virginia Beach, VA
For more info: Allan Lee, 17th St. Surf
Shop, 307 Virginia Beach Blvd., VA
Beach, VA 23451 (804) 422-6105
November 9th
SHUT UP AND SKATE '85
Houston Half-pipe.
Houston, TX
Rain date: Nov. 10. Call: Zorlac (214)
426-5591 or (713) 442-6554
HACKIN' AND HEWIN
The THRASHER Electronic Bulletin
Board.
For up to the minute information on
events, music, skate scene and other
happenings use your computer to call
(415) 822-5630 4:30 p.m. to 8:30 a.m. PST.
Thrasher Board supports 300 and 1200
baud modems.
BUST OF THE MONTH
From our file on business opportunities:
Call Pelecan Props, and ask for Dorthy. Is
the skatepark in question Del Mar? Can
Polecan Propertios be offering you the
chance to be a millionaire? Is the bulldozer
now headed for Del Mar Park? Shouldn't
you call and find out how much money you
could conceivably make off this splendid
opportunity? Haste makes waste?
Somewhere, sometime, somehow the
sport/art finds itself midway through the
eighties. Curiously, with the retread/rebirth
of hippie capitalism we find the skate scene
embroiled in a series of increasingly politi
cal disputes. Anonymous organizers at-
tempt to unionize the leading skaters in
clandestine motel rooms, white fat copora-
tion types vow in the barroom to keep con-
trol at all costs. Insurance men extort hefty
sums of coin from any kid with enough balls
to go public with his contest. Slimy movie
hacks offer the sport's finest the lowest in
pay, (far beneath the Screen Actor's Guild
required minimum) while offering to make
them "famous." Naturally the skaters who
participate will extract payment in full in a
hundred ways that the Hollywood cretins
cannot even imagine. (O.k. guys, please re-
turn the rental car to the set.) Manufactur
ers on the street level have their sources of
supply cut off by certain big boys who want
to own all of the toys. Established manufac-
turers, (guys who have lived on the edge for
years, during the bad), now find their origi-
nal designs appropriated by legions of
sleazy fast dollar forgers. Sleazy patholog-
ical liars attempt to sell products which
don't even exist. (Could anybody identify
the leather clad Laguna bikerboy holding
the empty box at the recent Action Sport
Retailer trade show in Long Beach? Rumor
has it he once was an All American publica-
tions type.) Into a once tolerable atmos-
phere, outsiders who claim to be insiders
initiate the "latest" vicious rumors regard-
ing (your choice): 1) manufacturers' under
world connections. 2) the latest grease pit
homosexual slurs. 3) tales of drug depen-
dancy. 4) phony tattoos. or 5) 1.Q. trans-
plants. (Curiously, during the last three
months more than 80% of the known
skateboarding world has been alleged to
be gay. Is it possible that, following Rock's
decline and fall, that AIDS paranoia is now
replacing rational thought?)
Corporate slams are no longer neces-
sary. Contests in their present formats are
debatable, Tradition is trash and skaters
are not interchangeable parts. Skating is
skating and political bullshit has nothing to
do with it. Fascist warlords who never did,do
not and never will skate, have no right to
dictate any terms regarding their own sur
render. Interestingly enough while the
money men argue over how to slice up the
pie, law enforcement types and legislators
move to ban skateboarding once again. In
towns like Benica CA, Sacto, S.F, L.A.,
Cleveland, N.Y.. etc. organized skate
harassment is on the increase. As always
the underground prevails.
And now to do our thing to assist the in-
surgancy we reveal that this month's latest
terrorist emcampmnents are near the fol-
lowing locations: San Francisco's 25th Av-
enue ramp, 2811 N. 48th in Lincoln, Neb-
raska, 231 Denison in Elyria, Ohio, the
bowling alley halfpipe in Hayward and the
Ellis Island cyclo-ramp in New York.
HIGHLIGHTS AND LOWLIFES DEPT.
Of course the highlight of the 1985 Com-
petitive N.S.A. calendar occured when Jeff
Phillips took off his helmet in the middle of
his last run and flung it into the crowd. Word
had it that those cryptic phrases written on
the helmet were the work of team manager
Rocco. Word also had it that Brad D. was
quite pleased with the lads brilliant strategy.
particularly the instant move from place
eight to number four. Perhaps that is why
Phillips was later viewed driving one of Mr.
Dorfman's custom convertible Mercedes.
No word yet as to what Jeff and Neil Blen-
der were diving for in the frigid waters of La
Jolla Cove? Perhaps it was another sal-
vage job similar to the one Phillips recently
completed at Lafayette, Lousiana and the,
Mardi Gras. What else can you say about a
man who grew up in Bankok and Korea?
Talking more voodoo. Can it be true that
Larry Balma has banned G.S.D. and a cer-
tain black magic she type from his house
because of occult leanings? Or is this just
another thinly disguised "make Davis take
a bath" campaign?
The talk among the industrialists at the
Action Sports Retailer trade show centered
on four main topics: Taters Hurtado's blue
neon H-print shirt. Rob Roskopp's alleged
five thousand per month board sales. The
location of the mysterious Mr. Powell and
Mr. Peralta who were there but never in
their booth. And last and certainly not least
the in person presence of the fabulous Ron
"Trademark" Bennet whose adroit line of
palter is pure show business material.
Perhaps Mr. Bennet should consider a
career in Las Vegas as a stand up come-
dian. Quite naturally the ever humble Ron
remains understated to the max.
Lester the K., the sporting great whose
commercial affiliations remain shrouded in
mystery once again further confused mat-
ters at Del Mar by turning down an offer of
one thousand cash and then riding a board
emblazoned with a massive question mark.
Europpan authorities are searching for
the whereabouts of two American "profes-
sional skateboard entertainers" whom re-
turned a junker Peugeot to a used car lot in
a particularly creative manner. Apparently
the lads felt that the used car salesman had
taken a couple of hundred under false pre-
tenses. In short car no work, no money.
According to authorities the car was re-
turned late at night in a shamefully unau-
thorized manner. All we can say is that you
get what you pay for. Anyone knowing the
current whereabouts of either Lance
Mountain or Tony Hawk please contact
the European office of Metropol.
CONTEST OF THE YEAR
Five hundred plus extremely agitated in-
dividuals showed up for the bootley Mon-
tegue banks event near S.J. With 28 ams
and 9 pros, a portable generator and
enough liquid to sustain a moderate sized
urban center under siege for two months,
the event was a major hit. O'Brien showed
hard clean and fast. Unfortunately Mr.
Hawk and the N.S.A. trainer missed the
celebrity skate heat, thereby keeping the
much anticipated showdown on hold.
Following the Capitola Streetstyle class
ic fifteen hundred skate types assemble at
Derby for an all out happening. No points
were assigned but it mattered anyway. The
Powell/Peralta Video Crew documented
the torture session for unspecified reasons.
It might be illustrative to note that the P/P
Video Crew had previously passed on
video taping the Capitola scene. Was the
choice for chaos over control?
And from Germany-yes again, Mr. Skip,
Natas and the S.M. Air crew show up in yet
another Deutchland mag, Mode und
WOHNEN, MAN UBER BO(A)RD BEIS-
TELLTISCM VON SKIP ENGBLOOM, NEL-
SON VALENTINE NATAS KAUPUS,
DAVID HACKETT, CLIFF ROBERTSON.
The printed pages feature paragraphs of
such unintelligibles. The somewhat clad
females are also undecipherable. Is this
what the New York Times and U.S.A. Today
were talking about? Is this one of those un-
derground skatezines that equals the "new
common art of the street"?
Of course for fun (?) those epic citizens
Peggy Couzens and Jimmy Goodrich
were observed plastering skate stickers
upon the stage of a prominent Broadway
show during intermission. Surely there
must be laws to discourage this sort of way-
ward activity. Surely the stage did look bet-
ter with the stickers. Surely once more life
yields to art. Did not G-Dog once comment,
I never met a sticker I didn't like"? Or was it
lick?
Unaligned video producer Don
Hoffman, king of the subliminal V cut, is re-
portedly hard at work on a further permuta-
tion for the electronic screen. Is Mr. D. actu-
ally going to finance his own video sales
outlet? Is Mr. D. obsessed with the letter V?
What kind of man wears antique wrist
watches? Is Hoffman going to re-team with
D. David Morin in a re-vamped D and D
production or is D.H. merely staying in
D.D.M.'s hilltop Hollywood apartment?
With Mr. D., D.H. and D.D.M. we are all get-
ting a little confused.
QUESTIONS
Is it true Rick Blackhart has purchased
a picturesque surburban domicile?
Is it true Dickvack is searching for the
mountaintop of his dreams in order to grow
wine grapes? Is a future wedding imminent
in Santa Cruz? Why do local women get the
Trashmen to never mention Fat Macs'
name in print? No wonder Doug Haut goes
fishing.
Following the N.S.A. contest is it possi-
ble that the Tahoe City Council passed an
anti-ramp ordinance? Has the Mile High
ramp been dismantled and sold off in
pieces?
Is the English Skateboard Assn. going to
require urine tests of competitors? Pass
the bottle boys and we're not talking speci-
mens.
Was it not John Lucero who was ver
bally accosted by HBO Television star Gal-
lager in a San Jose airport? Was not Gal-
lager wearing Day Glo orange sunshades,
a shirt with his name on it and eight inch
stacked heels? Did Gallager really wonder
why Lucero screamed his name at the top
of his lungs? Will alcohol make John revert
to age eight?
Was Peralta actually spray painting walls
on Sunset Boulevard late in the P.M.?
EXCLUSIVE Madonna pic
Did Nazi Police-types actually try to bust
Alva for the crime of being himself? Was a
term in a foreign jail the only solution to
Tony's rather exuberant personality?
Was J. Grant Brittain actually seen win-
dowshopping on Amsterdam's streets of ill
repute?
Did not Mofo get accosted by eight mas-
sive beer drinking Swedish construction
workers who were actually looking for
J.G.B. ?
Has Alan Gelfand, inventor of the ollie,
been sessioning with Monte Nolder?
Does Paul Schmitt's new job consist of
keeping his employer under control at auc-
tions? Is a radical neo-geo ramp now under
construction employing the latest computer
generated contours?
Are atomic bomb plans and anti-person-
nel device strategems a common part of an
unnamed zine's electronic computer inter-
change?
Is it true that Eddie Elguera was recently
ON BOARD
secretly married? Is the accompanying
photo of an alleged El Gato fact or fiction?
is Cash McAnlis pulling another practical
joke?
Is it true that Frenchy Ruscha, son of in-
ternationally prominent artist Ed Ruscha,
has joined Hackett and Jim Ganzer as a
designer at Jimmy 'Z?
Is it true that Christian Hosoi lost a wal-
let with 600 bucks cash in it and didn't even
know it till a week later? Is it true that Christ
rolls so heavily that the funds were never
missed?
Do the Trashmen get tons of unsolicited
busts in the mail each month? Was not the
wierdest of the year the packet of blurry
exclusive Madonna - Sean Penn wedding
photos? Who wrote "ike a virgin' in large
letters in front of the wedding? Were not
several of Malibu-bred Penn's old skate
buddies in attendance? Why do Jim Muir,
Baby Paul, Taywell Rudd, Jeff Van
Dusen and Nathan Pratt all claim that they
weren't there? Do photos lie? Were Eric
Nash and Grosso busted for trying to
sneak in? Is this why Jeff took the
Madonna sticker off his car? Was it Billy
Ruff who showed up in a 50's tux? Dic
Glenn E. Friedman shoot these photos in
an attempt to re-enter the pages of
THRASHER Mag? Who stole the cake?
Who cares?
QUOTES OF THE MONTH
"My shirt's from Neiman Marcus, if you
don't believe me, look at the tag."
Fausto V.
"If we can't have order here then what is
the purpose of being here?
Announcer at Del Mar
The pros can't tell you because they're
being paid to keep quiet."
Mr. B.
73