WILD RIDERS OF BOARDZI
24
WHAT IS IT THAT HAPPENS TO A
PERSON WHEN SOMEONE THEY
RESPECT AND LOOK UP TO
SUDDENLY GETS INJURED? THE
INVINCIBILITY ONE REGARDS
TOWARDS ANOTHER SUDDENLY
VANISHES IN THE SAME INSTANT
THERE IS THE FEELING OF "MOVE
OVER SKATE DOG BECAUSE THE
TOUGH DOG IS STEPPING IN," AS
THE ADRENALIN STARTS TO FLOW.
WE NOW REJOIN THE STORY IN
PROGRESS
Eddy-Boy heard nothing except
for the pulse in his ears. His adren
alin surging through his veins and
his eyes watering with wind's resist
ance. Two board's lengths ahead
of Joker, he headed to where the
nearest phone was to call the
Paramedics to come to the aid of
Blade and Nacho in their hour of
need. At the end of the block
Eddy-Boy barely rounds a sidewalk
comer, bumping his elbow on the
building But as Joker came around
he seemed he was going to make
it no problem. Suddenly, SNAP! His
rear axle broke, sending him flying
into the side of a parked car.
SMASH Hearing this, Eddy-Boy
squatted into a powerslide halt
Joker sat, slightly dazed, against
the car. A heavy stream of blood
rolled down the side of his pain
stricken face. Eddy-Boy stored
back diligently. After a few
moments he spoke. "Joker," a
pause. "are you OK man?
Joker shook his head to and fro
a few times trying to shake his wits
about him once again and said.
Yeah, I think so."
"Are you sure? Eddy said, trying
to make sure
Uh, yeah I think so."
Repeating himself, Eddy-Boy
said, "Are you sure you're sure?
"Uh, yeah I think so." Two seconds
passed. "Eddy-Boy. Why don't you
go ahead without me and call
the meat wagon? I don't think I
can make it 'cause my board
broke," Joker said, stressing the
fact that his board failed and not
himself. Eddy-Boy nodded and
then turned and skated away.
returning to his search for the
phone.
Meanwhile, back at the pool,
Blade and Nacho tried to pull
themselves together
"You OK Holmes? Nacho said
to Blade.
Yeah, I think so," Blade said, as
he held his side trying to relieve
the pain that was throbbing there.
What about your wrist? It looks
pretty bad"
Twill survive." Nacho said, show
ing no pain. 1 hope Joker hurries
up and gets help
TE bef you Eddy-Boy gets there
first. He's pretty fast
"Yeah, he is fast, but Joker's
pretty fast too."
1 guess we'll just have to wait
and see
"S"
The faint sound of a siren made
itself audible in the distance
Nacho and Blade looked at each
other and nodded affirmative
nods. Blade spoke gotta hand it
to you guys, you're not such bad
skaters. In fact, I think you are
pretty damn hot
Gracias Eh, you ain't so bad
either, dude. And that Eddy-Boy.
doesn't he ever fall down?"
"Afraid not. I think he's got mon-
key blood in him, HA
Nacho laughs, thinking to himself
that this Blade dude ain't so bad.
"Blade, wadaya say that who-
ever's side loses this standoff buys
the cerveza tonight and let's party
down real good? We'll share the
banks with you guys and we could
skate together in more skate-offs
like this. Shine this rivalry, man. It
sucks. Too much to worry about
man, you know?
"Oh, I don't know. Well, I guess it's
all right by me, but what if Joker
and Eddy-Boy don't go for it, let
alone all the rest of the guys?
"Listen Blade, my compadres do
what I tell them and if they don't
ke it (he snaps the fingers on his
good hand for effect) they're off
the squad. And that's all there is to
it man. No more, no less. Com-
prende?
Yeah, I dig I guess my guys
could manage to cool out and
session with you guys once they
got used to the idea. But it might
be hard at first."
On Blade's last words the ambu-
lance appeared at the poolside
Eddy-Boy was the first to emerge
with Joker close behind adjusting
a gauze beneath his headband
What in the hell happened to
him? Blade said to Eddy-Boy in
mock concern
Eddy-Boy turned to Joker. Joker
stared back at Eddy-Boy wonder-
ing what his reply might be. Turning
back to Blade Eddy-Boy said, "He
ate it just as we got to the phone
booth. His truck broke, but we both
got to the phone at the same
fime, didn't we Joker?
Joker stood befuddled. He didn't
know what to think Finally, he said.
Yeah, right Holmes Damn trucks
that's what I get for riding substi
tutes
In the meantime the Paramedics
were busying themselves with
attention towards Blade and No-
cho. They set Nacho's wrist and
put it in a sling. They then came to
Blade and checked his ribs. One
of them said. "From the looks of it
guy, it seems you have two broken
ribs, maybe more. Won't know till
we see some X-rays"
As Blade cursed to himself he
Boy
THE MAN was seen walking
towards his car shaking his
head and saying something
about the "WILD RIDERS OF
BOARDS.'
noticed a severe throbbing in his
right wrist. He held it up to look at
it. It was swollen like a ripe grape-
fruit. The Paramedics attended to
it and put it in a sling just as Nacho's
for medium comfort.
Joker stood at the side of the
pool scratching his face, trying to
get the dried blood off. He stared
at the pool's contour and dimen
sion. He was ready to skate. More.
so than he had ever been before
in his entire life. But the reality of
the whole situation prevailed over
his positive skate emotion. He
locked in one important area: his
board was broke. He turned to the
others and said. "Well, I guess
we're gonna have to call it a day.
"What do ya mean? everyone
chorused
1 don't have a skate, man. Well, I
have a skate, but the damn ade is
busted. I can't fix it."
Nacho scowled at Joker. "What
do you mean you can't fix it? Are
you crippled or what? I sure as
hell ain't gonna be riding for a
while. So just take the hanger off
of my stik and put it on your
board
Joker thought, "Why didn't he
think of it himself?" "Does anybody
got a truck wrench?
to
Apparently no one had thought
ring one and they all said
"Well, it really isn't going to be so
easy, Nacho. No wrench Nacho
scowled at Joker once again
"Joker, why do I always have to
think for you? Joker shrugged his
shoulders. "Joker, you have got to
be the most illogical fool I've ever
known. Just pick up my board and
ride it. They are both the same, ex-
actly
On yeah, huh," Joker said in a
slightly embarrassed tone
Realizing that the gig was still
on, Eddy-Boy jumped onto his
board and dove into the pool
warming himself back up with a
few gnarly aerials for the finale of
the day's confrontation. The Para-
medics stood with widening eyes,
watching the skate scene unravel
DER-23
before them. They saw Joker do
some outrageous one-footed
frontside edger carves that
covered five to six coping blocks
This was all too unfamiliar to one
of the medics, because every time
one of the skaters got into a pre-
carious situation, he would cover
his eyes with his hands
A
car pulling up beside the
ambulance diverted everyone's
attention from the heated action
in the pool was the local author-
ity. THE MAN stood out of the car,
an awesome sight with hat on
head mirrored aviator glasses on
face and hit stick in hand. He had
a large bulge in one of his cheeks
and seemed to be chewing
intently on it as he surveyed the
scene before him. He then spit out
a long brown stream of spittle
solution. The medic covered his
eyes once again
What in the hell do you guys
think you are doing? the cop said
in a long southern drawl.
The crew at the poolside offered
no reply. They just stood there with
ignorant expressions on their
faces their united defiance to
authority. The cop, seeing that he
to
was going to have some trouble
communicating with this motley
crew, withdrew his notepad and
proceeded to try and get the
names of the skaters. The other
medic stepped forward and
explained just what was coming
down here and that it was better
for the gangs to skate out than
to duke it out. THE MAN pondered
this and put his pad back in its
place. Turning to the wild riders of
boards he said "Yall can go ahead
and do your stuff here but yall
better watch yo ass's cos' ah don'
want no casualties on mah beat,
ya hear? An jes you remember
that ah nevuh saw yo' faces befo
in mah life, HEAR? And y'all nevah
saw mah face befo' either. OK?
OK"
On his last syllable Eddy-Boy
literally flew into the pool and just
shredded the hell out of it. THE
MAN just sort of got all excited
and said in loud punctuated words,
"THAT BOY JES TOOK OFF LIKE A
HELLS AFIRE Another stream hit
the dirt. "Nevah in all mah born
days have I evah seen anyone do
sumptin like dat boy is doin' right
now
Joker was so maximumly
psyched by the cop's hick logic
stokedness, that he decided to
drop in on Eddy-Boy for some
doubles action. Eddy adapted
right quickly and followed in as
Joker passed by. Roundhouse
carves became the name of the
game. THE MAN was in awe. One
of the Paramedics was in awe; the
other didn't really know what was
happening because his hands
were over his eyes. Eddy-Boy called
the shot, "FRONTSIDE GRIND
JOKER Joker's only reply was the
sourid of metal on coping. They
came around again. This time
Eddy-Boy was in front calling the
shot once again "FRONTSIDE
GRIND, JOKER Eddy-Boy flew into
a high backside air. Blade crossed
his fingers. One of the medics
pointed to Eddy in the air with
astonishment. The other medic
covered his eyes. Again THE MAN
said "LOOKIT THAT SUMBITCHI Ah
nevuh seen nothin' like dis, EVAH
as another stream hit the dirt
Eddy-Boy descended and they
both exited out the shallow end
and gassed on each other. Joker
offered his shand between them
The soul shake. THE MAN was seen
walking towards his car shaking his
head and saying something about
the WILD RIDERS OF
FBOARDS
Nacho was stoked. Blade was
stoked. One of the Paramedics
was stoked. The other medic was
sunstroked. Joker was stoked
Eddy-Boy was so stoked that he
had a grin on his face that lasted
fifteen minutes or so. He couldn't
wait to tell Naomi.
Blade and Nacho walked over
to the two warriors of skate. Nacho
said,
looked like a tie to me.
What do you think Blade?
"Hmmm, I'd say you were right
Nacho. These two guys are the
COPS
MEAT
gnarliest, quickest, get down,
superior skateboarders that I have
ever seen in my entire life," Blade
quipped in a mild attempt to
impersonate THE MAN 1 guess
we'll just have to take up a collec-
tion f
n for tonight's party"
Joker and Eddy-Boy looked af
each other in a sort of dumb-
foundedness that one might have
soon after wetting his pants. "What
do you mean, Tonight's Party?
Eddy-Boy said. "1 thought we were
mortal enemies
"Yeah Joker added.
"Well, it doesn't look like that to
me Holmes Nacho said in a
condescending manner. "You two
looked like you have been skating
together for years. Ive decided to
shine all that rivalry BS and share
the savings and loan banks"
"And I agree." Blade added
Then what are we doing stand-
ing around here for? Let's get
back to suburbia and let's get
down to some serious celebrating
I can't wait to tell Naomi. Oh Boy
Eddy Boy was ecstatic
Who is Naomi? Nacho said to
Blade.
Everybody laughed except
Eddy. He was looking to the future
prospect of seeing Naomi. Every
one separated with the decision
to meet at the savings and loan
that night. Blade and Nacho
went to the hospital to be fitted
with designer casts. Eddy-Boy
wasted no time in driving Joker
back into town, dropping him off
and jetting over to a waiting
Naomi. The Paramedics gof
another call A Supersonic train
had derailed over on the other
side of town. Life goes on.
THIS IS NOT THE END. HOW LONG
WILL THIS TRUCE LAST? MAYBE
WEEKS, MAYBE MINUTES, MAYBE
FOREVER. THERE IS STILL A DIFFER-
ENCE IN LIFESTYLE. THERE IS STILL
A DIFFERENCE IN OPINION. THE
ONLY COMPARABLE NOTE IS THAT
THEY DIG SKATEBOARDING. STAY
TUNED.
-MOFO